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HUGS... Breathe. She doesnt see you as anything but her sister. She is critical of herself more than anyone else. Just like you are more critical of yourself than anyone else. I know Im the same way, most people are. Pregnancy is emotional. On top of your hormone imbalence your body is changing in some pretty crazy ways. You feel alot more "fat" than you really are. Its a I cant see my feet, I eat everything I see, Man I want some brownies, wow that didnt used to wiggle as much thing. It must be hard to see someone you consider near perfect complain that she is fat. But Everyone is different, both our bodies and minds are different. I think the first step for you is to just feel more comfortable with yourself. You have to embrace all that you are!! I know how it is though. I am the biggest of all of my friends, and my best friend weighs maybe 95 pounds wet.. awesome.. and had a baby 15 months ago... evenmore awesome....and Im getting married at the biggest I have ever been in my life... even more awesome lol but you just have to embrace it because your size isnt what makes you... YOU!!! I hope you get feeling better!!! :)
@organizedbride11: aww that was so sweet it made me tear up, thank you! And thank you for not saying anything negative about my sister - I mean nothing negative towards her - we're best friends and I know she means nothing by it, but it is hard.
And you're right, I'm the biggest of my friends too, and it makes me self conscious. I hate going to the beach with with them because they look great in their bikinis, and I don't even feel comfortable in a one-piece! And everyone says I'm not fat (I've learned the art of dressing for my body ;) and I'm healthy and all that, but for a 21-year-old I do not fit the mold you know?!
thank you so much for your kind words. I just need assurance.
And now, I'm pregnant, and I'm so stressing about gaining 40 lbs! It will probably put me over 200lbs and I am FREAKING OUT about it!
Aww your welcome and congrats on your pregnancy!! You will gain weight but its amazing you will have a mommys body!! lol I weighed around 235 right before I had my son. I went down to 213 after I had him. Now I hover around 195-200 It is an art of dressing your body.. and of course I feel self concious at times. I think it has a lot to do with our ages. I am 22. But FI always tells me that I am more beautiful now because I got this body from carrying our child. It sounds stupid now but you will soon understand what I mean. Dont freak out!! You can handle it!!
We are all the harshest critics of ourselves and many times, the 'flaws' that we see in ourselves, we are unable to see in others, particularly those we love. I am sure her complaints are solely a result of how she is feeling about herself and is absolutely no reflection on what she thinks of you. We're all different but I think it's hard when your body changes and it's normal to complain about it, many times without thinking about how it may affect someone else who is similar to what you're complaining about.
Embrace your pregnancy, I am sure you have a beautiful pregnant glow and at the end of this, regardless of how much weight you gain, you will have a gorgeous baby in your arms! Definitely something to focus on and smile about! :-)
She just feels fat because she isn't used to having the pregnancy weight. She doesn't think you are fat.
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Okay this is more of a vent post or just a consolation that I'm not the only one who feels this way!
The majority of my family is overweight, and I found once I hit 18 that it's hereditary and I do my best to stay in the healthy weight range, but it's REALLY hard. I've only ever been overweight (according to BMI standards) for about 6 months before I freaked out and lost 10 lbs by changing some eating habits and exercising more.
Anyhow, my older sister is so not overweight. She is pretty tiny, about a size 4, practically perfect. And it's really hard not to be jealous. But she does workout pretty frequently too and eats great.
So she got pregnant and is about 8 months and complaining ALL the time about how fat her arms and legs are and it makes me feel so put down because she probably weighs my normal weight at 8 months pregnant, and her arms and legs are STILL smaller than mine normally. And it's so hard to listen, because I think if she thinks she's fat, what does she see when she looks at me?! It's so emotional because I WANT to be healthy, and I try really hard to lose weight, but it just doesn't happen easily.
(sighs)