Post # 1
I need some reassurance that I’m doing the right thing here. FBIL has an on-again, off-again GF who is lovely, smart, funny, and has been one of the most welcoming people to me. Currently she and FBIL are on. Originally, FMIL had “FBIL and guest” on invitation list. But now someone is throwing me a shower near FMIL and FMIL put GF on the guest list. That’s fine with me, but I said then we need to issue GF her own ivite to the wedding (I really strongly believe that no one gets invited to a shower if they are not invited to a wedding). FMIL is worried about the on-again, off-again status. This debate is a big deal because invites have just been ordered and will be addressed in early January.
Am I right to insist? Am I being difficult? What would YOU do?
Post # 3
DO IT! If she has been perfectly fine to you, and you’d like to have her there, invite her! It’s your wedding, not your FMIL’s. You get final say.
Post # 4
I also second the go for it!
She sounds like a really nice new friend. And btw, no you’re not being difficult. I think you’re being just as a friend would for another friend. 🙂
Post # 5
invite her, if they’re not ‘on’ at the time, simply seat her at a different table. She’s your friend too 🙂
Post # 6
If she’s “off” with her your FBIL at the time of the wedding, she will most probably not show up… so it should be safe to invite her. 🙂
Post # 7
Are you talking about sending a seperate invitation or just writing her name on your FBIL’s invite instead of “and guest”. Either way, I think you should do it. I agree with MrBee, if they are “off” she most likely won’t show.
Post # 8
I agree with mrbee – if they are “off” when your wedding rolls around, she likely won’t come, especially since you said she’s so nice! I think she should get her own invite 🙂
Post # 9
I guess it depends if you’d invite her if she breaks up for good from FBIL. If you would not want her there because it would make FBIL uncomfortable if they break up then you should invite him and guest. However, if you’ve become friends with her and you’d want her there independent of her relationship status then you should include her on the invite list.
Just know then you might be adding drama to your wedding day if they do break up. How will FBIL feel, he definately cannot bring a date if she’s going to be there or there’s guarenteed drama. I don’t think it’s a big deal either way, if I had an on again off again status I would understand coming to the shower and then not to the wedding but…..it sounds like you guys have become kinda close so it might be different for you.