Post # 1
FI has been away the whole month training for his second deployment (which will be January-ish) and I’m really struggling today I have all of these last minute questions about the wedding, things I would just love to be able to talk with him about, and I can’t! I got to speak with him for about 4 minutes on the phone last night, for the first time in over a week, and while it was so wonderful to hear his voice it made me miss him so so much.
There is so much left to do and I’m scared I can’t get it all finished by myself. My mom only does what I ask her and I end up feeling like I’m nagging her, my sisters live far away, and my other BM is pretty much, I hate to say it, a selfish pain in the you know what. She isn’t helping with anything! My mom and dad asked me last night for a list of dates and amounts due for all the vendors and remaining expenses and I wanted to just give up! I’m going to school, working full time, packing to move to our new house on base, and doing the entire wedding thing on my own. I just wish I could give FI a big hug right now *sigh*. I feel so overwhelmed.
Anyone have similar experiences? How did you cope?
Post # 3
((HUGS)) I have no experiences with this, but I’m definitely hear if you need a shoulder or want a virtual buddy to help!! Thanks for what you and your fiancee are doing for our country btw.
Post # 4
First of all (((((((HUGS))))))) . Take a deep breath. It will work out, it will be ok, and you will get it all done.
I feel overwhelmed a lot – and not so much right now about deadlines because we still have a while to go, but I work full time, have 2 children (and the 1st day of school is Monday) and since most everything in our wedding is DIY, there are things I actually need to get moving on because we need the time to make it work. Mostly the $$$ part overwhelms me, sometimes I feel like I’m running on a treadmill instead of making progress. It helps me to step back and take 30 minutes to myself. I make a list… of everything – every little thought that pops into my head. After I look at that, I can get the list in order of priority pretty easliy. If your mom is willing to help, ask her what she would prefer to do. Giving her a choice of tasks is considerate and she will appreciate it. Work in order and take it one day at a time.
Best of luck,
Post # 5
It sounds cliche but one day at a time and ask for help! 😉 hang in there it DOES get easier.
Post # 6
((HUGS)) My brother and my sister in law went though a simular situation. When my brother proposed to my sister in law he was just enlisted they had a wonderful wedding planned for May of 2007, then he was called to duty and they decided to have a private ceremony of just family before he left and then throw a big reception when he got back. I know it’s not the wedding of thier dreams but it made them happy. She was still able to wear her white dress and they were both able to go on their honeymoon to Las Vegas, but it was a year after. She coped through it all by continuing her education and getting her RN, she had a big support group with me and my family and her fellow nurse friends. They have been married now for 2 years this Thanksgiving.
Post # 7
Awww HUGS, that sounds really rough 🙁 You’ll manage though – just take it one step at a time and remember to breathe!
Post # 8
thank you ladies! I feel like an emotional basket case right now! One minute I’m fine and the next I just want to cry.
@Querida I am going to take your list making suggestion! Getting everything down on paper will probably help me relax a little. I’ll also try what you suggested with my mom. I keep waiting for her to just jump in and help but I don’t think that’s going to happen. And at the end of the day, if it doesn’t get finished, it can’t be that important, right?!
And I’ve arranged a girls night out tonight so hopefully that will cheer me up a little 🙂 Some champagne and girl talk is always a mood lifter!
I’m so happy to be a bee! It is WONDERFUL to have all of your support! Can’t thank you enough 🙂
Post # 9
hugs! Although my FI is not in the military, I had two serious relationships in the past with guys in the military and I know it can be so hard! I think it’s great that you planned a girl’s night! Enjoy that, and perhaps some of those girls would be happy to help with the wedding planning! When some of my friends have gotten married and I wasn’t in the bridal party I was always happy to help with anything!