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I'm sorry. This situations sounds really difficult :-(. The best thing might just be to try not to think about it and have your fun outside of co-workers.
If it makes you feel any better, I don't really socialize with any of my coworkers outside of work, though sometimes I'd like to.
Aww, that sucks. I have been there, actually there now with some of my "friends". I'm pretty bummed about not getting invited to a wedding that I was sure we were going to , and I was downright excited to go to. Its a month from tomorrow, and I'm certain we would have gotten the invite by now. Hubs is indifferent, but I'm a little miffed. We used to hang out with these 2 all the time, but it seems like now, that whole crowd has moved on. I guess because we don't like to go downtown to the bar every other weekend, we'd rather hang out at home and save money and drink here, or at someone's house. So I know all too well how you feel right now.
I wouldn't let them see that it upsets you, and try not to let it get to you. Maybe when they are talking about it, say something like, "tubing sounds like so much fun, I've always wanted to go but haven't had the chance yet." and leave it at that. It shows you are interestd, but you aren't flat out asking to go. Be subtle about it, and hopefully they will get the hint.
These people's behavior sounds so high school.
Make friends outside of your work colleagues.
awww *hugs* i'm sorry. when did you go back in time to high school? lol I wouldnt worry about it because it seems like they wouldnt be your real friends anyway plus just think this keeps you out of all the bs in the work place
@julies1949: kinda harsh, it might sound high school but its still so difficult when you feel left out and alone. Work is just work, but for the majority of people its a place you spend a minimum of 35-40 hours a week so of course what happens there is going to affect you!
OP, I would suggest maybe trying to cultivate friendships with others that aren't in the clique - you say its about 1/2 the store that does this stuff together, well maybe on days when that happens, invite one of your other coworkers out to the movies or over to your place for dinner. The best defense against cliques is to not buy into them. Even cultivating new friendships with members of the clique is a good idea - they probably are oblivious to the fact that they are leaving you out, and if you can become better friends with one or two of them, you might find yourself included. And if not, still try and surround yourself with great people!
Good luck - i understand how you're feeling all too well and I'm sorry.
Do you actually want to hang out with these people? From the way you call them a clique (I've never known that to be a favorable term) and bring up items like the dating in the same store and promotion, I wonder if you actually want to be friends or are just jealous. That could come across in your actions, and if them inviting you along stopped after that, it may explain why.
Regardless, it's more than likely they don't even realize they're excluding you - if you want to go tubing with them, the next time they talk about it, express interest in going. If they blow you off, find some other people to hang out with.
@ScarletBegonia: Thank you! It's not that the people in the clique are rude, because they are a lot of fun to hang out with, but I don't want to be that girl :)
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Where I am working there are several coworkers that are very very close and it's gotten to the point where they are forming one big clique and I'm beginning to feel left out.
I've been working at the same place for almost four years. Until about a year ago there was never this clique. I've known almost the whole time I've worked there that some are closer than others, and I get that, but when half of the store is going out tubing and others aren't invited it kinda stinks when you are on the outside.
About a year ago, a girl, we'll call her C, from another store transferred to ours because she started dating a shift at her store. That's not allowed so they moved her to my store. Another girl, let's call her L, from my store who had just gotten hired, was actually C's roommate. No big deal.
Then L started getting close to another girl K and they began hanging out outside of work. At first I was invited to hang out with them, and it was fun. L later started dating a guy named M at work, and even though that's not allowed my boss hasn't moved him and it's been going on since April.
On top of all of this, when I was up for promotion, so was L, even though she'd only been around for a short period of time. L got it, I did not. Therefore, L was now promoted and working as her roommate and her boyfriends superior. I've not gone back out with L or K because I've not been invited since then.
Another coworker J, said that he's always had so much fun going tubing and since he is close with C and L as well, invited them along. In turn they invited a few other coworkers and they went last week. Yesterday, when I worked I had to hear for like an hour about two coworkers having fun together at L's house, while I felt completely left out.
Almost everyone that I mentioned decided to go tubing today. I did not get invited. That's almost half the store that went today. I thought about asking but didn't feel like being rude, or THAT person who invites themselves along. I think I'll stay out of it and try not to think about it.
I just needed a moment to say, it sucks being the outsider.