Post # 1
Maybe I shouldn’t be, I don’t know. MIL wants pictures from our wedding, no big deal. She was going through them and all of them were basically pictures of her and her kids (hubby and his sister) and a couple that had me in them as well, as long as it had either her, or her kids in it. None were of the bridal party, none of me and my family, or even just me. But, whatever, I was just going to let it go, it was maybe 10 pictures? But, I mentioned that I had 49 free prints I could get from CVS (not totally free because I have to pay tax) and now she wants to use basically all of those prints to send pics to her relatives in Hong Kong. Now, I wouldn’t mind so much if maybe she seemed to really care that I was part of this wedding, and not just her son. I also wanted to send some prints to MY mom, but I’m unemployed atm so I really don’t have the money for this stuff. I know it’s not a lot of money, but who knows when I’ll be getting a job. I already bought prints to send to some of Hubby’s relatives that were invited and couldn’t make it, but I guess they won’t be happy with those anyway since it’s not just hubby’s family… me and my family are included. sigh. When did you finally feel like you were actually part of the family?
Oh, and I should add that my mom wanted pictures of everyone, his family included. Even my dad, whom she hates and divorced years ago, just because it was all part of my wedding day and its all important, in her opinion.
All of this was after hubby said "let me go talk to the "Joe" family. Like I’m not part of that family (I was in the room with him, and he was going out to talk to his mom and sister)? It bothered me, but I probably would have just left it if this hadn’t come up.
We seriously need our own place… unfortunately, won’t be happening any time soon
Post # 3
Do you live with them? If so, even if it’s hard, be a little grateful and give her the pictures.
If you can’t afford it, let her know that. She should be understanding and help you out.
You do need to address this issue with your husband and your MIL. Tell her how it makes you feel. Maybe there is something going on, or maybe she didn’t realize she made you feel that way.
I am sorry that you are unemployed. Best of luck finding employment and getting along with the new family!
Post # 4
Whew. It seems like you’re in a tough spot. I’m sorry that you’re going through this. I agree with allielovesnate that you should talk to your husband–especially about the fact that he has said something that makes you feel like you’re not part of the family.
Post # 5
I did mention the family thing to hubby. He said he does think of my as family. I think that’s really only something time will have take care of. For a long time, it was the three of them. Again, I also think when we live on our own that will really help.
MIL doesn’t really speak English, so hard to talk to her. I don’t mind giving her pics, honestly. I even made a photobook for her off shutterfly (just as I did for my own mom). I just didn’t feel like I should have to give her all of the 49 prints I have available, especially if she doesn’t really seem to care about anyone other the three of them and I felt that my mom should get some too. Just seemed kind of selfish of her. And yes, we live with his mom, but she’s not paying any bills.
Either way, she decided against it and just wants a few prints for herself, which I have no problem with.
Post # 6
Hi, I don’t have much advice for the original situation, but it seems that it is resolved, so I’m happy for you about that, good luck with everything else.
I just wanted to let you know, if you need more free prints, when you sign up for Kodak and Snapfish, they give you 20 free prints. I don’t know what Kodak’s shipping is, but SF is like $2-$3 for 20 prints, so I hope that helps budget wise.
Post # 7
Thanks Natakie, I’ll look into those websites too! I may have used the snapfish prints already though, but Kodak I definitely haven’t.
Post # 8
If you have the prints on digital files, can you just email those files to the family instead of sending them prints? Or burn them a cd with the files and have them print them out on their own? Maybe you can suggest that she take your digital files down to Walgreens on a disc and print out excatly what she wants (and also pay for them)? I don’t think you should have to use all of your free prints; those should be for you and your hubby (or you mom if that’s what you really want).
Edit: And apprently I didn’t read all the way through your last post because now the situation has been resolved. 🙂
Post # 9
We are giving her a disk, as well as the relatives, as well as a few prints of the wedding (by few I mean 23 pics each…) AND a copy of our wedding on DVD (which will cost more than a forever stamp to mail, let me tell you! especially to the uncle in Hong Kong). It’s above and beyond what I’d probably do for my own family, especially since his family didnt make any effort to come whatsoever, or give a reason why they can’t (except the overseas uncle). But, I’m trying to win them over, slowly.
My hubby and I got our prints already, so I don’t mind using the free ones for her really, just didn’t want to give them all to her, and I think it was rude of her to assume that I should.
But yes, the actual printing problem has been resolved. I still wish she’d want picture of the whole wedding and not sure her kids though. I understand if she doesn’t want pictures of random guests she doesnt know, but at least of me and my immediate family, or even just me, and the wedding party and such. Even me and her son, the groom, together would have been nice… but whatever.
Post # 10
I hear you on this one! I’m glad to see you’ve gotten some other options for the printing. I ran into the same situation with my FIL. I can understand him not wanting a photo of my brother, or my aunt, etc, but I think he would want a few photos of me with his son! Just keep a positive attitude and down the road things may change. Maybe.