(Closed) Feeling sort of sad about lack of enthusiasm for my own Wedding

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1779 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I wish I could give you a big hug, because I think it would help.  So here is a cyber one *hugs*.

 

I planned a wedding 5 states away and it was difficult, so I cannot imagine how hard it is for you.

My advice is… focus on the things you can do.  Maybe you cannot get the 100% perfect venue of you choice.  But you CAN have the 100% perfect invitations, programs, menus, favors, etc.

 Also… you probably don’t want to hear this… but if you would rather have the wedding in a Hawaii… have the wedding in Hawaii.  If people can’t afford to come, that sucks, but it is what it is.  Especially if people are not showing a lot of enthusiasm.

Post # 4
Member
7771 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

I can really relate.  It is really hard to plan without support, people where you live, people excited to help out, and people suggesting you wear someone else’s dress.

I second the advice to do what YOU want.  Maybe it is a blessing, in a way, not to have people being overbearing (?) or taking over your plans?  If you do want help- just ask, but that might be more difficult- negotiating others wants and needs.

Post # 6
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Here is a hug from me to you too!  I totally understand.  I had a sorta long engagement 17 months.  But now that its 9 months away and I need to really get started on stuff, everyone still seems to think its far away.  My mom actually said to me when I asked if she would help with stuff, “its your wedding, why would I help?”  So i finally decided that I’m going to take it all on myself, hope that some people will help and if they don’t, that sucks for them.  My day is still going to be awesome because I’m going to make it what I want it to be with or without their help!

Post # 8
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Oh dear! I just saw your post on my thread a minute ago, so aloha again!! I’m so sorry not everyone is showing enough interest in your special day. They may be feeling a little wedding’ed-out, from the other family weddings in the works, perhaps? Even still, that isn’t fair to you.

You know, my SO and I originally thought that of course we should have our wedding where our families are (in the NW, as you know from my post), because it seemed to make the most sense to go to where 99% of the people who are invited to this wedding are going to already be.

But you know what? We decided that our wedding needs to be about us, celebrating our life, and our love not only for each other, but for our home here. This is where we began building our lives together. This is where we will start our family. This is home.

Yes, you should be considerate toward your guests, but they need to also be understanding of your needs! Logistically, we came to the conclusion that it was just going to be far too difficult to plan our wedding from thousands of miles away. It would even end up costing us far more travel $$ for us going over there to see and book vendors, multiple times likely, than it would for someone traveling to HI one time for our wedding. And they would get a vacation out of it! We decided that to be fair, we should give them at least a year’s notice to save if need be, but that really all of our most important loved ones will make it no matter what.

Can you buy yourselves (and your guests) some more time by pushing back your wedding date to allow for everyone to plan to come to the island? I really think it would be a good choice for you.

And girl, I’ll get excited with you for your wedding here!! We’re neighbors! 😀 hehe! aloha nui loa & BIG big hugs to you. <3

Post # 10
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Oh and I forgot to mention that my parents still have not gotten me their guest list because they told me “they are busy” and its been 8 months that I’ve been engaged!  It takes some excitement out of the day, but I feell like i’d rather not tell them stuff i’m doing for the wedding, cuz they just complain and make it less fun!

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