(Closed) FFIL issues. Anyone else?

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
4774 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@artichokesalad:

Sorry, about your trouble, just do what you want, especially if you are paying for it.  And yeah the traditional Indian wedding is to invite evryone you’ve ever met and all their freinds and aquaintences. 

Post # 4
Member
231 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

That sucks. You tried to reach out to him, but it sounds like he wants all-or-nothing…which is unfair!

Maybe you could have 2 receptions? A very small one (maybe even less than 100 people) that you want, plus one for JUST his family, if he is willing to help pay? Then it can be wherever he wants and you wouldn’t have to give up the reception you have been hoping for?

He might shoot it down, but it could work if he is willing to compromise a little bit.

Post # 6
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

My husband is Indian and I know that it is tradition to invite EVERYONE to the wedding, but it is MUCH cheaper per guest in India. If you are having the wedding here in the states, that would be much more costly, of course. And since you two are paying, I agree that you should decide on who to invite AND where to have the wedding. I think you two need to be firm, but polite and explain that to him again. Tell him since you guys are paying, it would cost too much to invite everyone.

I hope it works out! Good luck. 🙂

Post # 7
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2010

So I just had our half indian wedding in the chicago ‘burbs. We originally wanted a downtown wedding, but with most of our guests flying in, we had it at a convention center near o’hare.  It was actually super convenient (three hotels were attached), really nicely done, and the food was awesome (they let us cater from wherever we wanted). I know Indian weddings traditionally have HUGE guest lists, but we compromised with my in-laws and are having a separate reception in Michigan, where they live.  This way, we got to have a smaller more personal wedding, and his parents are happy because they are busy inviting everyone to the reception in the summer. The reception will only include dinner, no ceremony, and since we are giving enough advanced notice some of his relatives from India can make it too. 

Our wedding was a mishmash of cultures and it actually worked out really well in the end, although the planning process was crazy stressful. Hope it works out!

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