FH wants to lift the blusher?

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
5769 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think this is one of those details that you can do really however you want. I bet most people can’t tell you who,lifted the blusher at the last wedding they went to. Do what makes you happy.

Post # 3
5432 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016

Do what makes you happy (: I don’t think anyone but you guys will remember. I expect that if the dad is lifting the blusher that it would be lifted at the beginning of the ceremony and if the SO is lifting it that it’ll be lifted at the end before the first kiss, but I wouldn’t be gasping in horror if a couple chose to switch it up aha.

Post # 5
918 posts
Busy bee

From what I’ve seen, the father lifts the blusher briefly to kiss the bride, then puts it back down.  The bride wears the blusher during the ceremony, then the groom lifts it when the officiant says “you may kiss the bride”.  But as PPs have said, do what makes you happy!

Post # 6
3646 posts
Sugar bee

Offend guests? This guest hasn’t seen a bride who wore a blusher, for years and years. Decades, maybe? I think you’ll be okay, with whatever you decide.

Post # 7
1715 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve seen this done before. I like it. 

There’s no logical reason for anyone to be offended by it. People may be surprised by it or think “Hmmm, I’ve never seen that before; how unusual”, but that’s about it. If anyone thinks it’s terribly odd or wrong, it’s ok, because what they think simply doesn’t matter. 

If you’re ok with it, go for it. You and your fiancé certainly aren’t the first couple to do this, and you won’t be the last. 

Post # 8
174 posts
Blushing bee

I was thinking about this same thing just a few days ago. After searching around a couple wedding websites, I found that either way is totally acceptable and not tied to any particular rules about etiquette. However, a few commenters on various pages noted that the veil has roots in representing purity/virginity, and so the father lifting the veil made them “uncomfortable”. 

If it helps, I decided to keep the veil down until the “You may kiss the bride!” moment =)

Post # 9
45 posts

My initial thought when reading this was: WTH is a blusher? 😉   So not helpful, but maybe that gives you some idea of the level of focus or importance on the blusher!

Post # 10
5769 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

The whole origin of veils and blushers was to hide the bride’s face, back in the days of arranged marriages. That way, if the groom got the “ugly” or “less desirable” of a family’s daughters as his bride, it wouldn’t be known till after it was too late for him to back out.

i am assuming your groom already has seen your face 😀

knowing the roots of this “tradition,” I can’t imagine anyone being upset or angry that you chose not to follow the old rules.

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