Post # 1
My fiance is a very loving man. And I know maybe a lot of women would love to have this problem, but I feel awkward whenever he tells me he’s been bragging about me. I’m not necessarily a shy person, but I don’t like to be center of attention, even when I’m not there.
For example, he brags about my cooking. He even makes it a point to bring in my leftovers and has had co-workers taste it. I find this incredibly embarrassing because although I may love expirimenting with recipes and cooking for him, I’m no Michelin star chef.
He also brags about my looks. This is the thing that makes me the most uncomfortable. He’s brought it up so much that he now keeps pictures of me in his wallet and in his desk, so when someone gets intrigued he has a picture on hand. In no way am I modelesque, I’m average/cute. Nothing to write home about.
It’s now made his work functions a huge point of anxiety for me. I fear I’m going to be judged harshly based off of my looks and cooking. I have this fear that once I walk in they will think: “That’s her? That’s it? That’s what he’s been bragging about?”
I’ve told him before about how I don’t like it, but he says he can’t help it. I know it’s coming from a sweet place…
Now I sincerely fear whenever he has upcoming work events that I have to attend with him.
How can I get him to understand? I’ve tried explaining it, but I don’t think he gets it.
Post # 3
@petalpetal: Bahahahha sorry to laugh but that is so cute! My FI brags about my cooking too and it makes me so uncomfortable! People expect chef skills when really I’m just good at that home cookin’! And then when we have people over I feel so pressured to make everything taste good that I over-salt everything and pretty much ruin it. I don’t have advice for you…it sounds like he just can’t help himself!
Post # 4
@petalpetal: IMO, just let him have his fun! I think it could be a little different if he was bragging about your sexual life, or the size of your breasts, etc…
but food and good looks? As awkward as it might be, you being humble and mildly insecure doesn’t have to mean he can’t tell the world how crazy he is about you and everything you do. I get that you want to be able to live up to his bragging, but at the end of the day his opinion of you is the one that really matters!
Post # 5
@boogiewoogies: Well, at least you made me feel better! haha. There is a huge distinction between making a great homecooked meal, and making something everyone will love. I’m a vegetarian so a lot of my stuff is very acquired taste (vegetarian meatloaf, vegetarian meatballs and spaghetti, etc.).
This is pretty much me any time he comes home and tells me about his bragging adventures:
Post # 6
@lolita39: You’re right. I really do know it’s coming from a sincere, and very sweet place. I’ve always been my worst critic, so I know things that go through my head don’t even come up on their radar.
Post # 7
@petalpetal: I just died laughing! I mean I literally have tears in my eyes, that is too funny…I feel the same way! And I think that if he can brag about your veggie meatloaf/meatballs…you must be pretty friggin good!
Post # 8
@petalpetal: Exactly, I get that it can be really stressful for you though! When I turned veggie I had to re-teach myself how to cook, and I became a damn good one if I say so myself! You have to learn how to really cook fresh and use raw ingredients! That being said, I’m sure you’re a wonderful cook!! His co-workers are lucky!
Post # 9
My SO does the same with his work friend he even told me the other day that when answered his phone to because his work friend calked that his friend said I sounded sexy on the phone, cringeyyy. But im cool if he wants to say nice things about me to his friends I know its never anything personal he says.
Post # 10
Be glad that he is mentioning you at work and that people know about you. It is better than him hiding you!
Post # 11
How flattering! Eat that attention up girl! Don’t be bothered about what other people may be thinking.
Post # 12
..at least he’s just bragging about your cooking. My DH (I’m sure) tells his buddies way more about me than I care to believe.
It sounds sweet in all reality. I’m sorry it makes you uncomfortable…but it’s so nice that he is so in with love and proud of you!
Post # 13
You would be judged by other girls at work events regardless! We have a bunch of new guys that started in the office and they’re all dating girls pretty seriously for over a year. We had a work related party and they all brought their girls. Afterwards, we all talked about the girls and how we were so surprised that the guys got themselves such hotties! The guys also talk about their girls at work – one of them goes around talking about his gf being so hot, she’s a 10. Do I think she’s a 10? Not at all, she’s certainly cute, but it’s adorable how smitten he is with her and she’s definitely a 10 (for him).
Bottom line is – people will think what they think regardless. It’s super cute that he loves you so much and is proud of you. Don’t worry about being judged just because he’s talking about you, it’s not going to happen any more/less just because he’s bragging about you!
Post # 14
@petalpetal: My husband does this to me all the time too, and while it made me super self concious originally (I didn’t want to meet ANY of his coworkers), I’ve learned to change my perspective about it. I’ve come to realize that when someone brags about their partner, most people don’t pay that much attention to what’s being said; they just secretly say “Awww” (or in some cases, “ugh”).
Post # 15
@petalpetal: I do that to my poor DH ALL the time! He says it makes him embarassed, but how do I NOT brag about someone THAT awesome?
Post # 16
He sounds like he is absolutely head over heels in love with you, and is amazed how he can snag such an amazing girl!
I would let him do his thing at work, and appreciate it for what it is. He is obviously very proud of you. Who cares what his co-workers think! It is his opinion that really matters. And I doubt very much they mind being fed good free food haha