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I think you might be overreacting. Your FI is not the one giving her the flowers, just delivering them. To me it's no different than the florist bringing you flowers--you aren't at all into the florist and you know they came from someone other than the messenger. I mean, I think the fact that you all know each other makes it even less of an issue because there is no misunderstanding between all of you on who is dating whom. Try seeing this really just as your FI as the messenger--he walks over, hands them off, and says "from BestMan" and walks away.
I completely agree you are way overreacting on this. Your FI is just playing delivery man no more no less. Not sure why you are upset on this?
Unless he's delivering them at midnight in his birthday suit, you have absolutely nothing to worry about. You're really overreacting.
I agree, it is a strange situation to be in, but I wouldn't worry about it too much. It isn't a date and think of it in reverse... would you be willing to bake a birthday cake for 'bestman' if his SO was out of town? you both know it isn't a date...
@sweetheart03: is the problem that he's not organising to have flowers delivered to you but yet he is helping his best mate have flowers delivered to his gf? If thats the case i sort of get it cuz hes willing to deliver them for someone else but not to organise anything special for his own girl.. otherwise if he does have something planned for u regardless then its not that big a deal
I am going to go with over reacting. I know when I lived in another town, My FI could not make it up to see me for my birthday because of a snow storm, so he called MY friend Chris and asked him to pick up some flowers and a card for him and give it to me.
Chris's G/f at the time didn't care, she thought it was really super sweet of my FI to make sure that I got something from "him" on my birthday. FI paid Chris back later, when he was able to make it up.
i understand what the PPs are saying, but i wouldn't say it's over the top overreacting. it's the symbolism of a guy giving a girl flowers, who is not his fiancee, but it was nice of your FI to deliver them on behalf of his best man. perhaps the best man could have asked someone else, but it is a little late to do anything about it now. vent away here though :)
Wait, the guy think's it's inappropriate to hand his gf the stuff himself because he's her boss, but it's ok to have it delivered to her AT WORK as long as someone else hands it to her???? He should suck it up and pay the darn delivery charges. Actually, if he's all worried about how things will look at work, he should give them to her on their own time, not the company's.
I don't think you're overreacting (too much). It is a stupid request of the guy to make. But don't read anything into it on your fiance's part. I'm sure he thinks he's just doing his friend a favor. However, he shouldn't do this particular kind of favor again.
I think that in return, the best man should buy flowers on your FI's behalf and deliver them to you at work!
He's delivering flowers, he didn't buy them for her. I don't think he's being disrespectful to you at all, he's helping out a friend (odd request, but...) The only issue I could see with it, would be if this woman and your FI ever had a relationship- that wouldn't be cool- but from your post, sounds like she's just a friend of the two of you. Would you be upset if he did the delivery for a stranger?
I don't think it's disrespectful at all.
He's helping his best friend out liek a good friend should.
I really can't see why you would have a problem with it. Can you explain your reason behnd being upset? The girl will know they are from her boyfriend not from your FI.
I'm trying to imagine how I'd feel if my husband's best friend (who was his best man) asked him to deliver flowers to his fiancee, and I honestly think it'd be kinda sweet. We're very close with my husband's best friend and his fiancee, and I know that my husband really supports their relationship. I think doing this would be another sign of support.
If my FI had a friend of ours deliver flowers to me on Valentine's Day, I wouldn't suddenly find myself in love with the friend o_O I wouldn't think anything about it beyond, "thanks for doing this, these are so pretty, I must call my man right away."
I don't see a problem with it at all. I work with my best friend's husband and would have no problem delivering a gift for her if needed! We're all friends, I don't find any issues with this. Same if my SO had to deliver something to any of my girlfriends.
Woops! Looks like the hive helped the OP resolve this issue on this thread:
Glad you feel better, OP! :)
I think you're overreacting. He's doing a favor for his friend, and he's being up front with you about it to begin with. I think jocember described it perfectly! I'd say thanks, and then go call FI!
I don't get it either.
I would actually prefer to receive flowers delivered by a friend rather than a random delivery person. It gives the illusion of planning even if it is because he is cheap. lol He asked your FI because he trusts him to get it done and you should trust him to be appropriate. I wouldn't have thought twice about mine making a delivery at a workplace for our friends.
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FI best man called today to ask him for a favor. He asked if he could deliver his girlfriend flowers and a cake since he is not able to do it because he is his girlfriends BOSS and does not want to pay the extra money to deliver it. Best man said If my FI did it for him He would do it for my FI, even though I am not at work tomorrow mind you. Ok so I say it is disrespectful for my FI to deliver this because we both know best mans girlfriend my FI thinks I am over reacting and he sees nothing wrong with this. I just dont want my man delivering any flowers for valentines to a woman that is not me! So am I over reacting?