FI doesnt like the dresses

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Why doesn’t he like them?

Post # 5
Member
463 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Maybe he’s worried about something else and is transferring it to this?  My FI does that sometimes.

What specifically doesn’t he like about them?  Did you remind him that he liked them before?

I would just say “Well…you liked them before, and I ordered them.  Now it’s too late to order something else.”  Maybe even offer to change them if he’s willing to pay for them.  That will reveal how much he really cares.  😉

If he’s already wishy-washy, maybe he’ll wishy right back to liking them in time, too.

My FI has cared very little, and if he did this 1) I would assume he was just speaking offhandedly and didn’t really care that much and I would just ignore him, or 2) I would just say “too bad” and just ignore him.  They’re ordered, it’s done.

Post # 6
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@jbbs1222:  Hmmm… I was about to say to tell him it’s too late, but then I checked your date, and there IS time to send them back and pick something else.  So, you can’t really tell him it’s too late, he’ll just tell you 10 months is plenty of time.

What are he and his groomsmen wearing?  And did he care about that?

Post # 7
Member
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

You know him best, but is this really something he’s going to dwell on, to the point of disliking your wedding photos for the rest of your lives? Or is he just like, “those are ugly, not what I had in mind, but oh well!” If it’s the latter, I think he’ll soon forget about it and it’s best not to worry – I don’t think it’s essential that he LOVE the bridesmaid dresses. So many other aspects of the wedding are far more important. 

Post # 9
Member
7098 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Eh….I think this is one aspect of the wedding the groom shouldn’t get much say in. He’s not wearing the dress, and the girls aren’t going to be standing by him. I think it’s much more important for your girls to feel comfortable and beautiful.

Post # 10
Member
6812 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

I don’t even know why this is something he has a say in something like this.  It’s YOUR girls and he already said yes before they were ordered. Why does he even care? He doesn’t need to dance with the girls or be with them all night (I can understand him caring what dress YOU’RE wearing). I would just tell him they’re already ordered, too bad so sad. Don’t like it? Don’t wear it!

Also – that dress is gorgeous.

 

Post # 11
Member
822 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Oh straight men & fashion…  That sounds like something my husband would do.  We chose our first dance song – For once in my life.  He like the Michael Buble version.  I asked a good friend to sing it and they already worked it out with the band and everything.  Then he heard the Stevie Wonder version & said it gives him anxiety and he hates it & we can’t do that song.  Too late!!!  We ended up working out a fun arrangement, did the song and he loved it!  I’m sure your fiance will get over the dress thing too.

Post # 12
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Westwood:  I agree – you should consult him to make sure he doesn’t hate them, but you did that!

And I’m always advocating not telling the groom what he and his party will be wearing, but for him to pick his own clothes (you know… like a man).  Same goes the other way!

Post # 13
Member
1007 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

What matters most is that the people wearing them like them IMO.  Obviously your and his opinions matter too since you’ll be looking at the pictures (and I don’t think your opinion matters more than his) but if the maids like them, keep them unless he literally HATES AND DESPISES them.  They’re the ones who have to pay and wear them. 

Post # 14
Member
3250 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@jbbs1222:  I think the dresses are gorgeous!!! And so wish I had found them for my ladies!

Not sure how to get your FI on board. But if you tell him what it will cost to get different BMs dresses, that might sway him.

Post # 15
Member
2413 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@jbbs1222:  If they weren’t gorgeous I might have a different opinion on them but those dresses are seriously beautiful, I want to pick one up for, I dunno, the black tie event I might go to some day.  It could happen…

The only thing I can think of is if one of your BMs is his sister or something and expressed to him that she felt horrible in the dress he might try to change it without outing her for it.  Otherwise I don’t see anything hateable about those dresses.  And there are some seriously hateable bridesmaid dresses out there.

Post # 16
Member
77 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

That dresses are fantastic and classy. My husband fancies himself to be keen on fashion. Respect his opinion and graciously ignore it.  I had to. He had an opportunity. Focus should be on you not on the other girls standing next to you. You did great. Don’t hesitate.

 

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