- 7 years ago
- Wedding: July 2012
So FI and I were having a general wedding conversation the other day about things we’d like for the wedding, and he goes, “Oh and definitely no kids, adult reception.”
This caused me a lot of concern. I am the last in my entire extended family to get married (I’m 30), and by this point, all of my cousins have kids or are pregnant. My sister has a one year old, and FI’s brother and his wife are expecting their first in September. I was already worried that those with kids would choose not to come anyway because of the hassle – both sides of my family are across the country from us, in two main regions. If we block out kids, I am TERRIFIED that hardly any extended family will come. Not to mention the sh*t I will get from my parents if my own sister cannot bring her son.
So here’s the backstory: FI’s brother got married to his wife a few years ago, when they were 24, and she was an absolute bridezilla. Her family hardly paid for anything, FI’s parents put down a ton to help them pay for it and several times she asked for more money and got pissy when FMIL wanted her to try to keep it on the budget. My FI was disgusted with the whole process and just really hated her at the time. So on top of that, they didn’t allow kids, which inconvenienced a lot of his extended family at the time, and then right at the end, she allowed some kids from *her* side of the family. Not cool.
I know he would want an adult reception anyway, honestly I have no problem with adult receptions in theory. But given where we are in life, as well as our families, I just think it’s unrealistic. I want family to come! 🙁 it would be probably 100 people max anyway, so it’s not going to be big.
I told FI that I was concerned about family not coming, and he referenced his brother’s situation and … well kinda mentioned that it it is only fair given what they did at their wedding. So that attitude worries me on a whole other level.
Our wedding is over a year out, we delayed it due to some family illness so theres no rush, but I’d appreciate any advice on how to resolve this.
Thanks either way!