Weddingbee boards

First, some background - We got engaged on Thanksgiving of this year.  He is 40, I'm 39.  First wedding for both.  He is in Austin, I am in San Antonio.  We have been doing LDR for the last 2.5 years.   I am very detail-oriented/type-A,  and get way stressed out under pressure.    He is also, but does not get stressed... We both have professional, full time jobs, 40-60 hrs a week.  I originally wanted to plan for a Dec 2012 wedding in San Antonio.  He countered hisstrong desire for a  May or June 2012 wedding!!! - ( I nearly choked on that!)  I compromised and we are now shooting for a Sept 2 (which I like bc its a long weekend) wedding. 

Of course, I feel like I am already WAY behind, according to every wedding timeline there is out there.  We had a venue appointment yesterday in my town that I felt that I liked Alot, and would be able to envision our day there, and was also within the budget.  He didn't like the flooring.....and  he just didn't "feel" like it was the one...

So here we are nearly nine months to the day we 'hope' to have the wedding with just a wedding ceremony location, but no reception venue,  and I am ALREADY feeling the pressure and the stress.   I am terrified that we will not be able to find any place for the reception in such a short time frame, and EVEN much more diffucult of a time dealing with the FI nitpicking venues left and right!  And let's not even get into how I haven't even had time to start dress shopping - he doesn't understand the concept that it can take 4-5 months for a dress to come in.  Our time is limited, we have a good sized budget, so im also worried that all the nicer places will be taken and we will be forced to settle on whatever's left.   That would make me very sad, considering I have been praying and mentally planning for this day since I was very young.    He seems to think that end of January is a good deadline to find a venue.   How can I convince him otherwise?  I hate to sound like a bridezilla, but I sometimes feel that It would be so much easier if he just left it up to me and my mom to get a planner and get the planning done...and I would let him have some greater input in other things  - like food, drink, DJ, honeymoon.  Do most bees do 50-50 wedding and reception planning and input with their FI? Or do most of you have traditional grooms that just want to "show up" on the big day?   I think my FI is just naive and lacks the knowledge about how this stuff all really goes.  How do I convince him otherwise?   I've been bummed out all day, fellow bees...I need your input.