Post # 1
I showed FI a pic of the dress I picked out – it’s tea length and I want a red petticoat underneath to go with my red shoes and red bouquet. He hates it. He wants me to wear something long instead. He said it’s not how he pictured me on our wedding day. He’s very traditional.
We are eloping to Las Vegas so I thought the tea length would be less formal and easier to get around in. I really don’t want a full formal gown.
So, I’m torn. What would you do in my situation? I really want to look beautiful for him but I love the dress (online so I haven’t tried it on or ordered it yet).
Post # 3
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
At first I was thinking wear it, you have valid points about eloping and easier to get around in…
but then I realized you haven’t bought it yet so I think you should keep looking.
Do you plan on showing FI every dress you think you’re going to buy? I only ask because he might not like something … until he sees you in it! I’m sure you know how to dress yourself but if FI is more traditional and you can’t talk him out of the points you mention above I would personally look for a more traditional dress. It can still be easy to get around in.
FWIW, and to help you understand where I’m coming from, when FI and I started looking at rings I realized he wanted something much more traditional than I thought we would, I love it but wouldn’t have picked it out without his help!
Post # 4
Ugh Men! I think if your heart is set on it buy the tea length. But if you want to go put some long ones on to ease your mind thats a very good idea.
FWIW, we got married in Vegas with 23 guests. I wore a long sheath dress and it was easy to move in/not heavy
Post # 5
Ok since you haven’t bought it I would keep looking if it were me personally. Now that you have an idea that he likes long surely you can find something you like as good…..possibly just the longer version of the dress you like? You can still do all the things you want like red shoes, bouquet, petticoat!!
Post # 6
@beesbelle: Why don’t you just go try it on first? If it really fits you well, and you still like it, you can go from there. Maybe even have your FI go with you? I took my FI dress shopping with me, and it was really fun going with him (whenever I go shopping with my mom she just tells me how fat I am). Just don’t rush anything, your perfect dress will find you no matter what.
Post # 7
I say give him some time to come around to the idea. It may have been just a gut reaction. Explain your reasons for wanting a shorter dress (which I totally agree with, by the way). If, in the end, he still adamantly wants you in a floor length dress, and you’re okay with it, then go floor length. But maybe he’ll come around to tea length after he’s had some time to think and it’s not quite so new and shocking.
Post # 8
@beesbelle: He might not like it on the model, but will love it on you because you will be his bride. I think guys have different reactions to dresses when they are in the moment and see you coming down the aisle. On the other hand would you want him to wear something that you didn’t like or never pictured on your groom? If you are dead set on it then go for it, but maybe try to compromise.
Post # 9
Maybe have him you see in another tea length style dress and then decide. But ultimately I’d never wear something my SO didn’t like.
Post # 10
Thanks for the advice. I am so torn. I can’t try the dress on because it’s in a boutique clear across the country. Pronovias makes a few dresses that are similar and floor length so I might go try some of them on to see if I like them.
Another thing was the tea length is so much cheaper than the Pronovias floor length ones – about $1000 or more so that really factored in to my decision, too.
Post # 11
He is marrying YOU not the dress so he will EASILY get over it.
Post # 12
Hate it. Gross. Ugly. That’s how he described it, lol. Ugh.
Post # 13
Every dress looks awful on the model. Don’t keep showing him dresses, find something you love, and it will be fine.
Post # 14
Post # 15
Ask him to show you a few ideas and go from there.
Post # 16
@beesbelle: I personally would keep the FI out of the dress-buying decision unless he is paying for your dress. It is your wedding day too and you should wear what makes you feel beautiful and comfortable!