(Closed) FI is in Vegas on his bachelor party – UGH

posted 8 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

That sucks, I’d be jealous too (jealous that I wasn’t going along on the trip, that is).  I think it’s normal to be jealous.  Try to do something fun, or something for yourself (like a manicure, massage, facial etc) while he is gone.

Post # 5
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

Yeah that’s one thing I don’t get — almost every time I read about these, the woman had a more lowkey bachelorette party and then the fiance flies off to Vegas. We lived together while we were engaged so maybe it’s different, but financially, that would’ve been off the table for us. We can’t afford for him to go play in Vegas for 5 days!

So I would totally resent that.

Post # 6
Member
326 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I’m with ribbons. I would resent that, too.  Not that your bachelorette party wasn’t fun for you, but that he gets the BIG stereotypical bachelor party trip.  My husband and I had a joint bachelor/ette party, partly because of that reason.  Lots of guys feel the bachelor party is more important and a big event, but we felt they needed to be equal or not at all.

That said, do lots of fun things for yourself while he’s gone! LOTS.  Try to make the best of it, and like you said, the quiet time might be kind of nice πŸ™‚

Post # 7
Member
14186 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Oh, i’d be totally jealous and crabby because it sounds like a blast!!! But then again, i went to LV for 3 days when a friend got married for her bachelorette party while DH was in Iraq. So yeah, he was jealous, too. But it was SOOOO much fun! Just tell him he owes you one…=].

Post # 9
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

@clarebee: I’m sorry and I don’t think it’s immature to be upset. Just be sure to take a trip without him after you’re married πŸ™‚

But it does kind of sound like you two have different definitions of what is your combined money and how you both get to spend it? I would maybe talk about that after this trip. It’s a legitimate thing to be upset about.

Post # 11
Member
4547 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I’ll be in your shoes pretty soon! FI’s best man just offered to take him to Vegas for the weekend at the end of the month. Otherwise, FI wouldn’t be going as there’s no way we can afford it. My FI’s not a big partier at ALL and I’m a touch irritated (ok, maybe jealous) that he’s going. My bachelorette party is a couple days at the beach and while it’s exactly what I wanted, we had both talked about having low key parties but a free Vegas trip was too tempting to FI!

Post # 13
Member
5978 posts
Bee Keeper

@clarebee: I can’t say I know how you feel, but if I were in your situation, I would be as annoyed and resentful as you are. Why did you have to scrap the second photographer just for him to go on a 5 day binge in Vegas? So not fair! And, I don’t think you’re immature for not calling him while he’s there either…I would definitely do the same thing. Call me crazy, but it’s BOTH of your weddings and you should both be saving anything you can to make what you want happen. I just don’t think it’s fair that you sacraficed and he didn’t…I’m kind of mad for you! Haha…

Post # 14
Member
351 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

Why is he going for 5 days?! He will be so over vegas after like 3 days haha. I understand your frustration b/c i also LOVE vegas so i would be hella jealous. Luckily my FI’s bachelor party is at his hunting cabin in the middle of the woods for a weekend – no jealousy there LOL.

Post # 16
Member
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I know exactly how you feel as my FI is going with 20+ guys to Vegas next month for 3 days.  I love him to death and I know he would never do anything he isn’t supposed to (I already set the rules…lol) but I know they will be hitting strip clubs every night as I know his boys very well.  I really don’t mind him seeing other women naked…it’s the “touching” that gets me a lil jealous.  My comfort is that I am going to have my bachelorette party in Vegas too 2 weeks after he comes back…and most likely my girls and I have will have a much better time than the boys will.

Stay strong though….keep yourself occupied and don’t let your mind race about what he may or may not be doing.  I think you shouldn’t let him know how much it is bothering you though because he may not feel comfortable or want to tell you what they are doing or where they went, etc…. for fear that he may upset you even more.  Just tell him to have a great time and that you look forward to him coming home to you….I think this will help him feel excited about his return and miss you even more. 

Remember…stay strong!  Call your girlfriends for support if you have to!

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