Fi is sick and cannot attend friends wedding

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
7531 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

If you are not sick, I’d show up, whether or not he could make it.  When you see the Bride & Groom, you could make an apology for him missing the wedding due to illness. 

Post # 4
Member
1226 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@CupcakeLove:  Would you still go if your FI was too sick to attend? I reckon just make your apologies to the bride and groom on the day, but don’t worry about telling her beforehand. As you said, it’s too late to change the numbers. One person not attending shouldn’t matter too much.

I once had to skip out on a wedding reception after I’d attended the ceremony – there was a four hour gap, and in that time my small headache turned into a full blown migraine and I was throwing up in the toilets and nearly passed out. My FI made apologies for my absence when he got to the reception and the bride and groom didn’t mind at all.

Post # 5
Member
1793 posts
Buzzing bee

If he has been that sick all week he shouldn’t be going into a huge room full of people and exposing them to what he may have.  I wouldn’t go.

Post # 6
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@CupcakeLove:  Final numbers are in. I would wait until when you wake up on Saturday and then let them know. I would be totally pissed (as someone who is also getting married on Saturday) if you called out now– just because you are horribly sick today does not mean that you might not be up for it in 2 days.

Also, be sure you let them know the day of so the caterer can move around tables if need be. Don’t just no show.

Post # 8
Member
975 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Glad to hear FI is on the mend!  Great the bride took it well (but how could she not!).

Quick healing to your FI!

Post # 9
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@CupcakeLove:  Tell the moh or mob now.  Don’t bother her if you aren’t in the wedding party.

Post # 10
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Just read it already is over, lol.  Glad it worked out and there weren’t hurt feelings, though how could there veL

Post # 11
Hostess
7630 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

@CupcakeLove:  Yikes, the emergency room? I hope everthing’s ok! 

Glad to hear it turned out alright. 

Post # 12
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Sorry he got so sick. I was going to say, regardless of whether he felt better, it’s good he didn’t go. Viruses spread!

Post # 13
Member
7208 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Duncan:  Can I just say that, as a bride, I was very happy that I was told! Two guests had health issues come up in the 24 hours before my wedding. Both made short phone calls to apologise (one the night before, one the morning of the wedding). I really appreciated it. Both because of the courtesy, and also I wasn’t left wondering at the empty seat. I think this “Don’t bother the bride she’ll be too stressed” thinking is rubbish. My wedding wasn’t a performance, it was a day shared with family and friends. And the phone calls were about 1 minute each.

@CupcakeLove: you did *exactly* the right thing. FI looked after his health, you notified the bride ASAP, and you attended yourself. (Though if FI’s condition was serious, of course it would have been fine for you to not attend also)

Post # 14
Member
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@paula1248:  I didn’t mean don’t tell the bride, I said to send the message via someone else.  My phone better not ring that day.  In fact, it will be off, and in the hotel, so as not to bulge in my jacket.

Post # 15
Member
5199 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

I would definetly tell her before hand.  Maybe she wont do anything, or maybe it will be useful for her to know.  I’d make the call 3 days before th wedding.

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