Post # 1
So my fiance has been sick all week and we have a wedding to go to this weekend. He has been to the doctors, had a heap of tests and is off work. He thought today he was getting better, but I just spoke with him and he is feeling worse now. He has this weird virus that makes you dizzy and lightheaded, so obviously leaving the house when you could faint isnt a good idea.
We have a good friends wedding on Saturday, and if he isnt better tomorrow I dont think he will be able to go. But when do you think I should tell her? It will already be too late for her to adjust her numbers for the catering, and he may be OK after another nights sleep.
What do you all think is the best way to approach this?
Post # 3
If you are not sick, I’d show up, whether or not he could make it. When you see the Bride & Groom, you could make an apology for him missing the wedding due to illness.
Post # 4
@CupcakeLove: Would you still go if your FI was too sick to attend? I reckon just make your apologies to the bride and groom on the day, but don’t worry about telling her beforehand. As you said, it’s too late to change the numbers. One person not attending shouldn’t matter too much.
I once had to skip out on a wedding reception after I’d attended the ceremony – there was a four hour gap, and in that time my small headache turned into a full blown migraine and I was throwing up in the toilets and nearly passed out. My FI made apologies for my absence when he got to the reception and the bride and groom didn’t mind at all.
Post # 5
If he has been that sick all week he shouldn’t be going into a huge room full of people and exposing them to what he may have. I wouldn’t go.
Post # 6
@CupcakeLove: Final numbers are in. I would wait until when you wake up on Saturday and then let them know. I would be totally pissed (as someone who is also getting married on Saturday) if you called out now– just because you are horribly sick today does not mean that you might not be up for it in 2 days.
Also, be sure you let them know the day of so the caterer can move around tables if need be. Don’t just no show.
Post # 7
So an update… If ended up in emergency at 4am Friday morning as he was in so much pain. Thankfully he was ok and got a diagnosis for what was going on! I called the bride Friday afternoon once we were home end let her know he wouldn’t be there.
She was really good and totally understood. I still went abe it was lovely. And today Fi finally seems to be in the mend… He’s got a few weeks of taking it easy and will be right.
Post # 8
Glad to hear FI is on the mend! Great the bride took it well (but how could she not!).
Quick healing to your FI!
Post # 9
@CupcakeLove: Tell the moh or mob now. Don’t bother her if you aren’t in the wedding party.
Post # 10
Just read it already is over, lol. Glad it worked out and there weren’t hurt feelings, though how could there veL
Post # 11
@CupcakeLove: Yikes, the emergency room? I hope everthing’s ok!
Glad to hear it turned out alright.
Post # 12
Sorry he got so sick. I was going to say, regardless of whether he felt better, it’s good he didn’t go. Viruses spread!
Post # 13
@Duncan: Can I just say that, as a bride, I was very happy that I was told! Two guests had health issues come up in the 24 hours before my wedding. Both made short phone calls to apologise (one the night before, one the morning of the wedding). I really appreciated it. Both because of the courtesy, and also I wasn’t left wondering at the empty seat. I think this “Don’t bother the bride she’ll be too stressed” thinking is rubbish. My wedding wasn’t a performance, it was a day shared with family and friends. And the phone calls were about 1 minute each.
@CupcakeLove: you did *exactly* the right thing. FI looked after his health, you notified the bride ASAP, and you attended yourself. (Though if FI’s condition was serious, of course it would have been fine for you to not attend also)
Post # 14
@paula1248: I didn’t mean don’t tell the bride, I said to send the message via someone else. My phone better not ring that day. In fact, it will be off, and in the hotel, so as not to bulge in my jacket.
Post # 15
I would definetly tell her before hand. Maybe she wont do anything, or maybe it will be useful for her to know. I’d make the call 3 days before th wedding.