Post # 1
So to make a long story short, Mr. McB is a third-year apprentice plumber who has been working for the same company building a hospital for the last four years. Mr. McB’s brother killed himself September of last year, and he missed quite a bit of work as a result of his depression.
Well today Mr. McB calls me at work and tells me he’s been fired for the amount of work he’s missed in the last year. What’s more is that there are very few trades jobs in our city right now (boom and bust oil town), and Mr. McB’s union will not allow him to work for three months after he’s been fired. And if he tries to work outside the union they fine him $1,500.
So needless to say I’m feeling hooped. I got out of college in May, and started my first job in my field in June so I’m barely making enough money to cover all of our bills/rent/student debt let alone the wedding. I’m starting to feel like we should cancel the whole thing, get married by a JOP and give up on the wedding dreams. Either that, or I go back to what I had to do while Mr. McB was off work after his brother’s death and work two jobs (and school as well back then), making for 16 hour days to make it work.
What do you think Bees? What should I do?
Post # 3
Wow. I’m so sorry for your fiance on both counts of his job and his brother. That is awful.
Are they allowed to fire him for that?
Post # 4
I am so sorry, both for FI’s loss, and for the situation you are currently in!
Since your wedding is in May, it might be tight to still get married givent hat Fiance can’t work for 3 months….the first thing I would think about is calling places you have put deposits down and seeing if they can be moved to another date. I know a lot of those deposits are non-refundable, but maybe they will let you push the wedding back? That is assuming you are ok with waiting, which you may not be…
Does Fiance have any other skills he could put to work (waiter, bartender, etc) during those 3 months? H emight be able to find something else which would at least take some of the pressure off….
Post # 5
So sorry ! I would say go with a smaller wedding now, or JOP and do the ‘wedding’ you want as a vow renewel …or just post pone the wedding all together ? why not get married in 2013?
Post # 6
Yes, unfortunately his union’s by-laws prohibit him from missing the amount of time he did for bereavement. It’s been rough going- I’m just hoping it gets easier for him soon.
Post # 6
I think for right now drop the wedding plans and get married JOP.
I wish you the best!
Post # 7
How awful, I’m so sorry to hear that happened.
Its really up to you and what you feel you are capable of and if going back to 16 hour days is something you’ll be ok with doing for at least 3 months. Will you be disappointed if you don’t have a wedding? Is postponing or downgrading an option? JOP services are not for everyone but that are a great alternative and can still be beautiful as many lades here have demonstrated.
Post # 8
I am so sorry this happened. I was in a very similiar situation as my husband is in the trade as well. He lost his job shortly after we got engaged and there was no way I could have afforded much on my own. He ended up landing on his feet and even starting his own company. I would wait it out. Give it at least 6 weeks and see how things turn around. There are a lot of ups and down in the trade and I feel like it has been much easier for many people I know with a license for any trade to find a job much quicker than someone with a bachelor’s degree. I am surrounded by plumbers, electricians, and carpenters and have seen a lot of panick and then seen all of these people land on their feet rather quickly. Good luck and just stay on top of all the job adds and talk to everyone you know (you never know who know sthe right people)
Post # 9
I’ve thought about trying this. This is where we’re kind of hooped- we booked an all-inclusive venue for our ceremony/reception which is notorious for being very rigid, we booked it because we thought it wouldn’t be a problem.
Also, we’ve sent our STD’s (not that that is a huge thing) and already have all of our wedding stationary paid for and done. Definitely something to think about though. Thanks!
Post # 9
My husband just lost his job as well – its been tough on us and luckily made it through the wedding without this hurdle. Just know that it will only make the two of you stronger as a couple…if you have dreamt of your wedding i would push it out honestly. you could always do a JOP wedding then have a big reception when you have the funds. hang in there, Unemployment blows – but 3 months will go by quickly.
Post # 10
@FutureJessicaMcB: You can always have a wedding on any budget. It doesn’t have to be a courthouse wedding. You can cut the guest list, do DIY projects, do a potluck or self cater, etc.
Or you can pick up a second job if you really want to go ahead with the planning.
Post # 11
@FutureJessicaMcB: Sorry to hear about the loss of his brother and now his job 🙁 It sounds like you live in Calgary. Fiance is hiring for another trade, but it might be something to earn money in the mean time…PM me if you want more info!
Post # 12
This is so good to hear. I really hope he can find another job sooner, he’s going to try to appeal to his union. We’re so close to Fort Mac where they’re dying for people and they pay far better, but he can’t go if his union tells him no. I’m glad your fiance was able to get it together so quickly!
Post # 13
Sorry for the losses. Does the union not allow him to work *any* job or just any trade job for 3 months? Can he do anything under the table that pays cash so you dont have to work two jobs? Personally, I think I would reschedule the wedding and just have it later. Part of getting married to me is the celebration with friends and family… the rest is just paper work. I couldnt give up the wedding to just be married unless it were for other reasons like insurance or something.
Post # 14
Oh my goodness ((hugs)). I can only imagine how stressfull that must be.
Could you scale waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay back (borrow a friends dress or look at consignment stores, potluck reception, paper flowers, BYOB) so you don’t feel like you’re compromising? At the end of the day, if you want to be married, you can get married either at a JOP or at a small, DIY wedding. I’m sure you can figure something out that wouldn’t cost much at all.
I’ll be thinking of you guys, please keep us posted!