Post # 1
I’ve started prodding FI about what kind of wedding dresses he likes, because I obviously want to wow him on the big day. Bottom line is what I like, but his feelings are taken into consideration, and I do care a lot about it.
So he says “I don’t know about dresses.” So I do the obvious thing and start showing him a few different kinds. He loves sheath dresses but those are out, I cant pull them off and I don’t want to — this is the only opportunity I will probably ever have to wear a big showy princess dress without looking like a crazy person and I reallllly don’t wanna waste that. I want to look ridiculous and over the top and a sheath dress isn’t gonna cut it.
So what else? He doesn’t like “pouf” but then, I showed him two or three dresses I like with pouf and he said they were very nice. I showed him a few other examples and he said TOO POOFY when to my eye, they were nearly the same. I showed him some dresses that have a very, very dramatic A-line and again, half of them he loved, half of them he hated, and he absolutely could not explain why. I even made sure to cut off the model’s head when I showed him them.
He mostly seems to consistently like really far dropped waist/mermaid style, but I haven’t found any that are extreme and crazy enough for me so far, though I bet they’re out there…
Any advice? Should I just not bother and choose whatever I want and assume he’ll love it because I’m wearing it?
Post # 3
Well, if he doesn’t like “pouf” and you are going for “extreme and crazy,” it sounds like your preferences are mostly going to cancel one another out. You might find one or two dresses that you both like – but then when you go to try things on, you might find out that they are hard to source where you live, or they don’t look good on you in person, etc.
You should probably flip the order of how you’re doing things. Go try on a bunch of dresses, get a selection of gowns that look good on you, then see if your FI has strong opinions about any of them.
Post # 4
@Bebealways: Any advice? Should I just not bother and choose whatever I want and assume he’ll love it because I’m wearing it?
Yes. He’s probably being vague because he wants you to wear what you love and not limit your choices.
Post # 5
@Bebealways: Advice: buy a dress you love, feel great and comfortable in. Give the guy a break, he will love you in anything you wear. They look a lot different on than off.
Post # 6
@Bebealways: My FI is the same way. It really depends on the dress itself and how it looks on the model, I’ve realized. It’s not about a certain cut or a certain fabric. When I asked him to describe what he wants me to wear, he said he wants me to wear something that is classy and that I won’t regret looking back at it in 20 years, which is why he doesn’t want me to wear anything where the bodice/bust is overly beaded. Now, I understand what he wants. Showing him dresses was NOT helping.
What I would do is go for a dropped-waist ballgown. They have them and the poof starts around the hip area and poofs out a LOT because it’s a ballgown, but it’s not so poofy that it’s overwhelming on top and I think it sounds like a great compromise between what you want and what your FI seems to like (mermaid, etc).
Until he sees you in dresses (I’m planning to take my FI wedding dress shopping with me), he’s not going to know what he likes or dislikes ON YOU. And honestly, you’re going to pick the dress that is the best dress on YOU and that’s what he’s going to love. He’s going to love it because you’re going to look beautiful in it and because he loves you.
So – either take him with you wedding dress shopping – or just pick what you like and know that he’s going to love it anyway.
Post # 7
Some sample drop waist ballgown dresses (are these poofy enough for you??):
I just googled some pix to give you an idea; sorry for the size!!
Post # 8
He’s a guy… he doesn’t know anything about dresses, nor does he really care. You’re going to look stunning to him no matter what you’re wearing. I’m sure he’d just rather be surprised.
Post # 9
I think in the end he will love you in whatever you choose. I would just go dress shopping and buy what you love rather than what you think he will like, because I think he will like it regardless!
Post # 10
He’s going to think you’re beautiful no matter what you wear. Find your princess dress, poof and all 🙂
Post # 11
- Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA
He’s marrying you, not your dress– get what YOU want; honestly, he wont care that much, and he’ll think you look amazing no matter what.
It sounds like he’s trying to be a good sport, but my guess is he probably doesn’t care that much. So long as you’re the one walking towards him, I don’t think he’s going to be paying much attention to your dress.
Post # 12
Honestly, you’ve already done more than me by asking what HE likes!
Like you said it’s the one day where you can wear what you want, so I’d just go ahead and choose the dress that’s the most special to you.
I’m sure you could wear a black bin bag and he’d think you looked beautiful!
Post # 13
He can’t tell the difference between a drop waist, an empire waist, natural waist, ball gown, or a line. He’ll probably see that it’s long, puffy (or not puffy) and white. Just wear what you love, he’ll love you in it.
Post # 14
You should pull up Bee photos that are similar shape to yourself and then find out what he likes. If he likes sheaths on the models, he might not like them on “normal” women. It helps to see real-life photos. My dress on me looks nothing like the model pic.
Post # 15
Personally I don’t think the fiancé should have input on the dress. Guys really don’t know bridal fashion, and it’s totally different seeing the dress in pictures on other people than on his bride on their wedding day. I doubt many guys have ever hated the dress. Go with what you want!
Post # 16
@SoupyCat: To add a whole new dimension to this, it might not even be white, haha. (I’ve asked if this would scandalize anyone he knows, he said it would be fine.)
@Bazingau: I like that idea!
@futuremrsk18: That’s probably the shape I’m gonna aim for. The second one is nice.
Adore and appreciate the comments — you’re probably right, he’ll likely think I’m beautiful no matter what I wear.
@Pinkmoon: I especially like your note, I agree, I’ve never heard of a groom disapproving!!