Post # 1
So my DH and I and a couple of married friends were chatting the other day and got on to the subject of what it means to cheat and related topics. We had very different opinions so I thought I would put it to the Bee and see what you all thought.
My friend has been with her DH for 7 years, married for 1. She would never cheat on him. However, she said that if a really sexy girl (Scarlett Johansson was the example used) came and threw herself at her DH that she would let him sleep with her as she knew it was a one off and that at the end of the day, she is the one he has chosen to spend his life with and she knows that it’s just sex. She feels that it’s a sign of her love for him to not deny him such an “opportunity” and would like her DH to do the same if the situation was reversed.
My DH and I were pretty shocked by this (as was her DH in fact!) as to us if you choose to spend your life with someone, you don’t want to sleep around, even with someone uber sexy. It’s like telling your DH/DW that they’re not good enough for you but that on a normal basis you are settling for them.
Post # 2
I think a lot of couples have these celebrity lists. On mine is Hugh Jackman. On DH’s is Natalie Portman. It doesn’t mean anything, and it isn’t insulting to our relationship. And really, I don’t know anyone who takes it seriously.
And even if someone does take it seriously, so what? Every couple can decide how open or closed their relationship is, and it isn’t for you to judge.
Post # 3
bowsergirl: I don’t think many people take that kind of thing seriously.
My man knows about my obsession with Leo D. and Robert Downy Jr. but he would in no way shape or form be ok with me sleeping with one of them if by some chance in heaven the opportunity presented itself. And to be honest, I wouldn’t want to. There are tons of extremely sexy people out there who are not celebrities… What makes them any different? They are just people with lots of money that I unfortunately have to hear about more often than I’d like.
Post # 4
ezasabc123: In our conversation the celebrities were one example but the girl said it would apply to any really attractive girl her DH met, famous or not. She was ok with that and was serious about it. Having said that, if the situation really presented itself who knows how she’d react.
I was surprised by what she said and wanted to know how other bees felt about it. If that’s what makes her happy then why not. I wasn’t judging, just trying to understand
Post # 5
LaPetiote: I think it depends on the relationship. My husband and I are really only into each other (we’re weird like that lol), so neither of us have celebrity crushes or anything similar. However, one of my good friends has an open relationship with her husband, so it’s totally different for them. I think as long as you are open and honest with your partner, do whatever works for you.
Post # 6
Open relationships creep me out. Just…no…never.
Post # 7
housebee: Yep, DH and I are like you. That’s why I was so surprised by the conversation.
Post # 8
JEEZ. I would NOT be okay with that. to me monogamy means monogamy, not just until someone hotter comes along. that would be very hurtful to me. and I would think it’d be hurtful for that woman’s husband too for her to say that she expects to be able to sleep with a really hot guy just because it’s an “opportunity.” TBH, this type of opinion really grosses me out. Sex isn’t an opportunity or something to check off a bucket list. this kind of arrangment would feel cheap and degrading to me.
Post # 9
Sounds like she is fine having a bit of an open relationship as long as it is just sex. I mean, there are plenty of sexy people out there.
Post # 10
romantic@heart: In fact she said she would be happy for her DH to do that and would want to do the same if the situation were reversed. Her DH agreed with us though and would never go for it. In fact I think his wife shocked him!
Post # 11
Relationships mean different things to different people. For my FI and I, choosing to spend our lives together has nothing to do with not sleeping with/dating other people. Both of us have had a number of other partners (both one offs and longer term) and it’s never been a problem for us. I know that doesn’t work for everybody, but it’s what works for us. We aren’t any less committed to each other because we’re non-monoamorous.
Post # 12
Yeah, but only someone really really really famous. We both picked 2 people that we could sleep with, if given the oppertunity. His were Natalie portman & Katy Perry, mine are Justin Timberlake & ian somerhalder.
But let’s face it, none of those are ever going to happen, so it’s really nothing to get all worked up over.
Post # 13
- Wedding: June 2014 - Ontario, Canada ♥ EDD- April 2016
Neither my FI or I really have serious celebrity crushes that we bring up regularly aha, but I don’t see an issue with it since in most cases it’s just a joke. That being said, I would see any kind of intimacy between my FI and anyone else (celebrity or just super hot chick) as cheating and would not approve. He feels the same way. We’re not into any kind of open relationship.
Post # 14
We each have our free pass lust of celebs. I think I stand a better chance that him though. But it’s never going to happen.
Post # 15
LaPetiote: I would NEVER cheat on my guy………………well…………….unless Richard Armitage threw me down and tied me up. What’s a girl to do?