(Closed) Fight with parents (who are footing the bill ) :(

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2186 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

EVERYONE fights during wedding planning. i am starting to think its required. and it depends on what the fight was about and what was said.

somethings are forgivable and some arent, so i cant really comment on that part.

Post # 4
Member
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

Ugh, that sucks, I’m so sorry!

It sounds like you’re really upset about this fight, which I can totally see why. Could you talk to your dad about it or are you guys not close like that? Maybe another form of communication, like email? 

Not sure if those ideas will help but I wanted to say I’ve gotten into a lot of fights with my mom during the wedding planning, I think it’s just the nature of the beast!

Post # 5
Member
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

That’s sad, and your wedding is so close.  I completely “get” the dynamics between your mom and FMIL.  My daughter fell in love practically with this one boyfriend’s mom, who called her “baby girl” and so forth. My daughter even bought her flowers on her birthday (not mine). I didn’t like it, but I was very nice about it. Now I am going to use that good karma to advantage by asking “baby girl lady” to help host a shower for my daughter now that she’s getting married (to someone else’s son).  Yes, I am a bit evil… but in a very nice way.

Hope that made you laugh.  The best thing to do is just put a bandaid on the thing with your mom and delve into emotional roots later, after the wedding.  Don’t wait for apologies that might never come… change the topic… distract her… arouse her maternal instincts if you have to.  Something that always gets my attention is a cryiing daughter on the other end of the phone-  mine always does it for real reasons, but you sound like you could use a big hug anyway.  She might respond to that.  Have some good wedding things handy to bond with her:-)   Best wishes for a beautiful wedding day!

Post # 8
Member
8354 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I am sorry you are having problems with your mom. I think you should call her and apologize, but also let her know she hurt your feelings. She is probably afraid of losing you completely now that you are getting married, especially since you two have had a rocky past. She probably feels like she is just getting you back only to lose you again. Just reassure her that sure, your relationship will change because you have new people in your life, but that doesn’t mean you don’t love her any less or that you don’t want to be close with her.

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