fighting dirty…. what's your worst fight?

posted 5 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
9627 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@the_newlymintedmrs-s17:   Wow.  I don’t advocate violence.  Ever. 

However, in your case I make an exception and applaud you.  You showed remarkable restraint.  I’m with you on the kitchen thing – what he did was horribly, horribly … just … wrong…

You let him off easy, lol.  πŸ˜‰

Post # 4
1335 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Kempinski San Lawrenz, Gozo

lol. it’s funny when you look back on it though. apart from the name-calling. 

our worst fight was pretty lame. I ended up calling him an asshole, so he slept on the sofa. we made up in the morning. in 4 years and a hell of a lot to deal with, I think we’ve done quite well! πŸ™‚

Post # 6
2250 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We’ve had our share of big blowups over the 7 years we’ve been together, mostly because I admittedly have a nasty temper and pretty much spew venom from my mouth when I’m mad πŸ™‚ I honestly could not tell you what any of them have been about. Usually things (like a dirty kitchen) that seem rather insignificant in the long run but at that very moment, are the Biggest. Deal. In the World. I scream and say mean things, he gets all dark and quiet and shakes his head a lot, and I usually end up sleeping in the guest room (with the dogs, because they like me better…. lol!). C’est la vie!

Post # 7
7022 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

Dh and I don’t have fights that escalate to that level.  Ever.  So, none of our squabbles really stands out as the “worst”.


We don’t call each other names.  We have been known to raise our voices, especially Dh who tends to get a bit loud anyway, which he doesn’t realize because his hearing isn’t the greatest due to his love of aviation.


If I’m really mad, I’ll say things like “what the hell is wrong with you”, but that’s about as bad as it gets.  I’m also a pouter.  Dh is very even keeled, so he’ll just go back to what he was doing before the arguing.


My therapist says we don’t fight so much as we kvetch at each other.  I had enough yelling and screaming with my abusive ex.  We are a no drama couple.

Post # 8
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@sassy411:  I don’t know if we’ve been at that point either, I have a tendency to talk loud and I grew up in a house where screaming was the norm so unfortunately I have a tendency raise my voice while barely noticing it which drives my fiancé insane and upsets him. He rarely screams so if he’s screaming I get scared (not afraid of him like he’s threatening me, but since he NEVER yells I know he’s really pissed when he yells) We have never called one another names though.

Post # 9
406 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

the worst fight me and Fiance have ever had was when we first got together and our first year living together was really rough. i had just moved to a brand new state (from west coast to midwest was a huge shock to me) to be with him and wasn’t used to being away from my family and adjusting to my new home/relationship. well, i thought i saw him checking out this girl at this festival and normally, i would be like okay you’re dumb but whatever! but in my eyes, he did it SOOOOO blatantly, that i just flipped out. i admit that i was pretty insecure because i didn’t really feel settled in oklahoma or anything yet…but we had to leave the festival early and when we got home, i literally unleashed the beast and we fought till about 3 am. from 6 pm to 3 am. and it was mainly me just screaming nonsense. 

ahh…we laugh about it now…but back then, it was no joke.

Post # 10
1714 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

My ex had serious anger issues and was just a arsehole all around. We fought a shit ton. He brought out this ugly, angry side of me I didn’t know existed. Alongside the abuse, it was just terrible. One fight we just called each other lots of names, and I wanted to go for a walk. He wouldn’t let me (stupid reason; he said the dogs in the area would bite me. Seriously?). So I walked towards the door and he pushed me really hard, onto the ground. It genuinely hurt. I am not a big girl, quite small in fact and this completely shocked me. No man has ever laid a hand on me ever like that, and I just went completely crazy, told him to get out right away. We fought almost every day when we were together, and more than once a day when we were long-distance (He lived in Ameria, I live in the UK).  


Now, with my current SO (who is a completely chilled out darling), we do not fight. We have had one bump on our road, which is when he thought I was not being affectionate enough (I didn’t want to be seen as clingy), and I just broke down because I hated the thought of hurting him. I only cried, but neither of us shouted or yelled, were violent etc. But that has been long resolved, and we get on just fine. Definitely a more adult relationship, where we talk things out rationally. Been together for a year and a bit, and I’m moving in with him in June πŸ™‚


Otherwise I have had horrible fights with my family. My brother recently hit me multiple times and I was left with bruises everywhere. Got to the point where I was seeing red but I was unable to fight back because my mother was holding me back. Chances are if she wasn’t, I would have put him in hospital. We still have horrible punch-ups (I’ve knocked him out before).
I’ve also punched my dad once (when he was hitting me). Neither of my parents hit me since then. They completely acknowledge that that form of discipline was wrong and they wish they never used it.
Also didn’t speak to my dad for three months because of the things he said to me in an argument. That was fun. Thankfully things are much better now.  I promise I am not a violent person, it’s just the family who seriously set things off! (And my brother normally starts these fights off)


Post # 11
3697 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My worst fights were with my ex-bf.  One night he was screaming at me about lord-knows-what, so I went to sleep on the couch.  He woke me up at 2 or 3 am and asked me to come back to bed so I figured we were ok.  BoywasIwrong.  He started yelling, again, about how stupid I was.  I think that was the night I ended up walking down the street in my pj’s at 4am (I lived a few houses away).  And every other fight with him he brought up some past indescretions that my father made that I mistakenly told him about.  What my father had to do with my ability to cook hamburgers I’ll never know, but he sure had to let me know. 

My husband and I have only really screamed at each other once – right after the wedding.  It was about the number of whisks we needed in our household.  It was a stupid, stupid fight with some deeper rooted issues.  We worked it out though, and we’ve never slept in different beds when we’re in the same city since the wedding.

Post # 12
2490 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I can have a really bad temper sometimes… I’m not moody but I can definitely be “firey”, especially when something isn’t going my way.

We had a huge fight about him lying to me about something. I was PMS’ing and already in a shitty mood because of work and other things, and me and him were already not in the best possible place. I ended up getting so mad that I threw my phone at the wall. It wasn’t directed at him (it was the other side from him), I was just so mad that I couldn’t help it. He picked up my phone, handed it to me and told me that if I’m going to throw things I should leave and don’t come back until I’ve calmed down.

I’ve learned my lesson and no longer throw things in fights. And my phone did break in case you’re wondering.

ETA: Me and my ex had some HUGE blowups! He was no stranger to punching holes in the wall and I was bad for just screaming at him.

Post # 13
1963 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I think our worst was a screaming match we got into while we had an hour and a half drive ahead of us. Usually we’ll gripe at each other for a bit, then go our seperate ways and in an hour or two we’re cooled down and we make up and talk about it. Not this time.

We were on our way home from a wedding, and since I was Dirty Delete I was sober Darling Husband was pretty wasted. He accidently told me that he had chewed tobacco a few days earlier, a habit which I find absolutely disgusting, and as someone who lost a parent to cancer at 20, him doing anything that is clearly carcinagenic makes me sooooo mad. I asked him to promise me that he would stop, somthing that he has promised in the past and generally sticks to, he said something drunk and stupid about me not being able to dictate his movements, and it quickly escalated into a yelling match which we could not cool down from being unable to take a moment since we were stuck in the car together. We pretty much intermittantly yelled at each other combined with me turning the music  way up to drown him out when I got sick of him yelling and him turning it back down. The entire thing was super juvenile and honestly really dangerous for driving! When we got home I stormed off to sleep on the couch and he followed and forced cuddling on me until I agreed to come to bed. In the morning we were both super ashamed of how it escalated and made up.

As a side note, I don’t think he’s touched chewing tobacco since and that was a year and a half ago. He even called me during his bachelor party inform me of his decision to decline despite peer pressure. So i guess end goal was achieved, but that is def an argument I would have skipped in hindsight.

Post # 14
163 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Fiance and I have a fight about once every month or so, and once every six months we will have a screaming match over something ridiculous…honestly I can’t remember any of the reasons.

But he has never sworn at me. He is awesome. πŸ™‚

Honestly I wouldn’t mind a fight right now because that would mean we would be living together again! 

Post # 16
7653 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

I can get pretty stubborn and feisty, but Darling Husband is so passive aggressive. I challenge him to get mad because I want him to argue. It does no good and doesn’t solve anything when he just keeps quiet and let’s it go because then he doesn’t know how I am feeling nor do I know how he is feeling.

Our biggest arguement actually happened a few days ago. I was mad about a BIG mess in my clean kitchen too! And I was trying to get Darling Husband to realize I was mad, and he just was being SO passive about it. Finally I told him he was cute when he is trying not to get mad, and he let an “F You” fly at me. I told him any other time I would get mad, but this time I won’t because I egged him on. I told him no matter how bitchy I have gotten I have NEVER called him names or says “F you.” We apologized and life has carried on.

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