FIL accidently gave away my DIY decor to the decorator after wedding last year

posted 2 years ago in Decor
Post # 2
Member
1303 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Chapel on Base

I think it’s too late now.  Why now?

Post # 3
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee

Who knows if she even has them after a year? I would say make the call and count on her not having them/not giving them back and if she does than bonus.

Post # 4
Member
262 posts
Helper bee

i would say its too late now.  its over a year.  after the first 90 days would be too late.  

Post # 5
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

My vote is that it’s too late now, too.  Why did you wait so long?

Post # 6
Member
357 posts
Helper bee

Umm, it’s a little late for that now.  If you wanted them back, why didn’t you contact her sooner?  

Post # 7
Member
1099 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

Have you told your FIL that it upset you or have you just been short with him with out mentioning why? I’m sure it was just a mistake on his part. I’m a bit confused though why its a year later and its still an issue? I would have contacted the vendor immediately after finding out (maybe you did?) and I’d be attempting constantly to get in contact with her if she ignored the first attempts. As a vendor she should have spoke to you before just taking your FIL word for it but unfortunately she didn’t. Also, in case it gets crazy when you talk to her, do you have actual proof they are yours that you can show? In case she decides “no those were mine” and gets shitty about it?

Post # 8
Member
2688 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

Another vote for “Wow, it’s way too late to ask for them back now.” I think you should tell yourself that they are long gone — chances are she doesn’t have them in her possession anymore — and move on. It was a long time ago. It was an honest mistake. I’m sure your FIL had no idea that you’d have any use for them after the wedding was over. Seems like you need to get over your anger at FIL.

Post # 9
Member
3713 posts
Sugar bee

I think you’ll have to work on geting over it and increase your tolerance toward your FIL. It’s been over a year. The decorator may have just tossed them, to begin with. You certainly can’t ask for any profits back, that she might have earned for renting it all out. That kind of stuff doesn’t stay great looking forever – is it worth going ballistic over?

Post # 10
Member
6034 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

If it wasn’t important enough to you to bring up to your FIL in the last 15 months, then it is not important enough for you to hold a grudge over.

Post # 11
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Sorry but it is too late now to askfor them back.  You should have contacted her and told your FIL right after you found out.

Post # 13
Member
1072 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

EmeraldTiger:  If it is still bugging you, just call and ask about it.

Eg. “Hi! I don’t know if you remember me, but you did my wedding last July! It has been a bit of a mystery to me what happened to the wooden roses and bottles I made after the wedding, but I was recently talking to my FIL and he mentioned that you might have them! Do you remember at all? I know it is late notice but I would really love them back if you have seen them!”

Chances are they are probably long gone, but at least if you find out for sure you can hopefully let it go.

Post # 14
Member
2580 posts
Sugar bee

My SO helped me move when we first started dating, I had a bunch of bags of clothes and what I thought was a seperate bags of stuff I wanted to get rid of. Well he ended up tossing bags of very expensive clothes! I was pretty upset when I unpacked and was missing a lot of thing. Did I hold a grudge for months and months? NO. If it was so important to get those particular things to my place I should have made sure it was very clear that they needed to come. I didn’t so I have no room to blame him as he was only trying to help.

 

Long story short if your DIY decor was that important to you the people helping you should have been told very specifically. If you couldn’t trust them to handle it you should have hired someone to clean up who you could hold responsible. Your FIL was helping you, doing you and your husband a favor you need to let this go before it affects your relationship with his family long term.

Post # 15
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Personally I’d let it go as its really only stuff and not worth worrying over. But if its really bothering you then I’d call the decorator to ask.

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors