FIL making threats..

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

First, tell him you do not want any financial contributions from him. His are certainly going to come with strings.  Second, do not talk to them about the wedding.  If they bring it up, change the subject!  

What is your FI saying/doing about FIL’s behavior??

Post # 5
Member
432 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

@FutureMrsKenward:  I agree with PP, if FFIL makes any contributions he is going to be even more demanding. Your FI should let him know that the wedding finances have been taken care of and that this is your wedding not FFIL so the decisions you make as a couple will be solely your decision and nobody elses. End of story! Do not discuss wedding plans with him at all and if they do bring it up, don’t give any details, just say we are still deciding. Obviously include them to the prior events but again do not discuss any details. 

I seriously hate when parents try to control wedding plans! 

Post # 6
Member
1362 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley

@FutureMrsKenward:  Well I’m glad FI is standing up to him!

I would not worry about him making a scene. You will be so caught up in having a great time that even if he does, you probably won’t even know about it/notice!  And if you’re worried that it’s all anyone will remember – don’t! People are going to remember that you had a beautiful wedding.  If he does make a scene, it’s doubtful your ENTIRE guest list will witness/notice it.  The ones that do will think of him as a poor father for behaving the way he is, but that will NOT be the main memory from your wedding. 🙂

Post # 9
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@FutureMrsKenward:  I agree with these other ladies, he shouldn’t be included anymore! It is so frustrating especially when it is family of you FI. I am glad that your FI stood up to him and the next time he says something like that or threatens your day I think you should say something to him to. So sorry to hear that you are dealing with this, your day will be beautiful and I hope that his family doesn’t interfere with any more of you plans 🙂

Post # 10
Member
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

What a nightmare!

Hopefully he’s all bluster. And he’s the one who’s going to look like an ass if he’s the only one that shows up with kids!

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