Post # 1
So my future in laws have graciously offered to pay for the alcohol that will be at the reception. My fiance and I are comfortable with wine and beer (and champagne for toasts) at the reception (though truth be told, I think I am really the one who wants wine and beer only and my fiance would be ok with whatever. His family and family friends are known to get a little bit out of hand at events like this, and I am just petrified that this will happen…for example his dad PANTSED his brother at his brother’s wedding during the bride/groom first dance. Just to give you an idea.) Money is not an issue and they could afford to provide an open bar, which is what I think they want to do. So my question is.. since they have offered to pay, do they get to choose what type of alcohol is at the wedding, or can we politely request that beer, wine, and champagne be the only types of alchol offered at the reception??
Post # 3
Just give him the list of what you need
Post # 4
Those who pay have a say 🙂 I think if any requests/suggestions are to be made, they should be made by your FI since it’s HIS family. Be prepared for them to kindly disregard your wishes, and since they are paying, it’s their call.
Post # 5
Unfortunately, once you take money from someone, their opinion counts. You have to take their opinions into consideration and go with it, but you can also start out by giving guidelines, like “FI and I wanted to do beer and wine only, maybe if you wanted we could do a signature drink…” and go from there. But you have to give them a say once you take their money,
Post # 7
I guess I am just having a hard time with it beause my family is SO the opposite of, we are paying, so we get to choose everything!! My parents are paying for large portions of our wedding, which is so incredibly gracious, but they basically want to leave everything up to my fiance and I, and would never push their opinions on us and say “We are paying so we will do what we want!!” Giving the wedding to us is truly and simply a gift from them and they just want us to be happy. I must just be blessed with my parents!
Post # 8
Of course them paying gives them a say, but since this is sort of a gift to you, you get a say, too. Talk to them about what you’re comfortable and try to find a middle ground.