Finding more and more flaws in my setting…

posted 3 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@ahraysee:   You have a perfectly normal and great ring that you have absolutely picked to shreds with your mind.  I don’t see any of the problems you mentioned, and I don’t know if you actually measured your band or what, but it looks a lot like my 2mm band that also holds a half carat. 

Post # 4
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Ugh, :(, I recall your original story and agree you should go to a new jeweler – I can see flaws just from the pictures 🙁  I’m so sorry – it really bugs me your FI isn’t taking your feelings into account.  Has he changed his mind?  If I’m remembering correctly he didn’t want to talk about it right?  But I would definitely get it changed – you will hate it more and more every time you look at it closely 🙁

Post # 5
Member
1148 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@thirdtimeisthecharm:  Although I don’t see the flaws, I agree with her and should have added something of the like to my own post. If you aren’t happy with it, the feeling will only grow. 

 

Post # 7
Member
932 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I have never heard a 2mm band is dangerous for yellow Gold… People buy 2mm bands daily.  My 1 carat solitaire sits on a 2mm band.  I don’t see the flaws, but if you are concerned.. perhaps you should consider taking the ring to another jeweler to have them inspect it to make sure it is ok. 

 At the end of the day, you have to happy with your ring, but if it is going to tear apart or reate unneccessary drama in your relationship, just move beyond it and make sure you have insurance on your ring.  No matter what you FI paid for the ring, when you constantly look for flaws the message you send him is “what you did for me, wasnt good enough”. 

 

 I do understand your dilema,  and while  my ring didnt have those type of flaws, I would have preferred a  thicker band and maybe a little larger diamond, (I have1.01 carats), but I put out a little bait to see about getting a different setting and I could tell, that was not the way to go…  So I got some really cool stackables to go with solitaire and I love the variety and abosolutley love myy 1.01 carat soliatire.

 

 

 

So just remember the committment you are making is really not about the E-Ring, its about the two of you growing together in love. 

 

 

 

Just my thoughts…

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Post # 8
Member
4223 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I think if your diamond it fine, you should return the setting if possible and buy a new one. I would not be trying to repair it if it’s that flawed.

Post # 10
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@ahraysee:  Is your diamond secure?  Can you move it?

 

I feel like you are picking something apart that isnt’ there- but I also sympathize because I know I have done it in the past with other things.

Your band in not dangerously thin by any means.  My 2mm band is the same as yours- and my wedding band is actually very thin- in terms of thickness, but it’s still rock solid.

 

I’m not sure what PP are seeing in the pictures- there’s nothing you can see wrong in either of the pics, IMO.  If your diamond is loose, or you can feel it move when you gently tap it with your nail, you need to see a jewler. 

I don’t have prongs- my ring is bezel set.  

One thing you have to remember– while excellent craftmanship does exist, and you should never have aa ring with prongs that aren’t hilding the diamond securely- handmade items are just that.  Handmade.  There is no such thing as perfect, especially when it comes to handmade, crafted items.

 

While talking to a family friend who is a jeweler, he did tell me that some diamonds have to be set every so slightly crooked, or might look ever-so-slightly off- because of thier cut, so that’s something to consider if the prongs on your ring are secure but you feel like you can see light.  Prongs are supposed to securely cradle the diamond and hold it in place.  To me, it seems like as long as everything is secure- it’s ok if you can see miniscule light pass through.

And FYI- there are different shaped prongs.  So just because yours do one things at the top and others do another thing doesn’t mean there is anything “wrong” with them necessarily- it just means they are different!

Post # 11
Member
932 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@ahraysee:  Seriously… to put your mind at ease.. because it is your gradmother’s heirloom diamond… take it to another jeweler and just let them look at it to make sure it is ok.  that will put all of this to rest one way or the other and stop the agony you are feeling over the ring.  If they give your ring a clean bill of health then there is nothing to worry about.. If you simply just want a different setting and YOU believe your FI is ok with switching it out, then I say go for it.  But as I have learned with my hubby…. Just because he agrees to it because he wants to make you happy… doesnt mean it didnt hurt his feelings. 

So, for your own benefit so you can stop worrying, just stop in your local jeweler and tell them you need a check up on your ring.  Don’t tell them what you see, let them tell you what they find..

 

Post # 12
Member
4893 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I don’t see anything wrong with it. I think it’s beautiful. However, if you feel strongly about it, take it to a different, reputable jeweler and see what they say.

Post # 13
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@ahraysee:  I dont necessarily see anything terribly wrong with the setting, however I WOULD replace the head to get a white gold head.  This should be able to be done without remaking the ring.  If your center is above H color, I would def change it- a yellow gold head will make your ring look more yellow (assuming that’s not the look you want.)

All else being said, that setting in 14kt gold shouldn’t have been that insanely expensive. I would be surprised if it was more than $400- if you really don’t like it, you can try to return it OR even pawn or scrap it and buy a new setting. I personally don’t see anything “wrong” with it, but if you dislike it, I think you should change it… especially since the cost is relatively low.

Post # 14
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

@ahraysee:  I can see what you mean about the bottom of the band, but it looks just like mine.  The reason mine looks like this is because it was resized a full size down (from a 6.5 to 5.5).  I’m personally impressed that mine looks as good as it does for that amount of sizing…however, this makes me possibly think that maybe this setting your ring is in was not cast for you and was instead another setting sitting around that the jeweler popped the diamond in and resized. 

Post # 15
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@ahraysee: I definitely think you have picked apart the ring way too much, but I also think that if you feel that way you shouldn’t just deal with it. I would take it to another jeweler and have them take a look.

Post # 16
Member
1179 posts
Bumble bee

@ahraysee:  I am sorry you feel this way about your ring. You should love your ering. That being said, I pick things apart too, I am OCD. I do see the difference in the band as well as agree that the prongs are a bit bulky and high. Those things would bother me as well. I would also rather see white gold prongs especially in a .50ct diamond, it will accentuate the diamond better (maybe even make it look a bit larger). 

I think I would save for a reset. I paid very little for my solitaire at a local jeweler and they even paid me for the gold I turned in to help defray the cost. Good luck!

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