(Closed) Finding myself overwhelmed

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Me too!  I finally called my bff near tears and was like “I don’t know how you did it,” and she was like, “Um, you pretty much told me when to get things done by or it wouldn’t have gotten done.”  That’s when I realized that I kind of had.  We had weekly meetings leading up to her wedding and I sort of looked at the to-do list and said, “Do this by this date.  Do this by this date.  Make sure you get a date night in around here and that you treat yourself to something nice at around here.” etc.  So I made her promise to come and do the tough love act with me XD

Do you have anyone who can help you like that?  I think that it especially helps if your friend has been married before and knows what to expect.  

My biggest hurdle is that two weeks ago I thought I had plenty of time and now I feel like I have no time and too many DIY projects and I can’t bring myself to do things that need to get done because it’s so…big.  I hope my friend can help me with that.

Post # 5
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@little_cricket:  Do you ever feel like the more you think about it, the less productive you are?  I swear every time I start to make a list of what needs to get done I start shoving things into the “figure it out later” pile.  I even sat down with the express purpose of finding things to do now; my favors are an easy thing, right?  I’m making bookmarks out of ribbon and some clips that go at the ends.  All I need to do is order the material, cut the ribbon, and clip the little clamps down.  Not too difficult.  

Every time I go to order, I go, “Ahh but I can do that later, it won’t take very long, and there are way more important things to do now!  I need to talk to vendors and I need to find hotel blocks and I need to decide on STDs!”  Fine, if I go ahead and start talking to vendors, that’s great logic…except that I just get frustrated and don’t call a single vendor.  I’ve had my poor caterer waiting for me to sign a contract.  But now I am resolved to schedule an appointment.  I will email her before I allow myself to post on here again!

ETA: Done.  That actually makes me feel a lot better. 

Post # 6
11172 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

Do you have any friends that have either hired or are wedding planners?

I hired a wedding planner and she created a schedule for each month of our engagement complete with to do list. If you could get your hands on something like that it would at least give you an idea.

Post # 7
173 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

i sometimes feel like it’s hard to reach a decision, and therefore i have a million halfway completed tasks.  your wedding is such a huge deal in your life – in terms of the significance, the cost, the amount of preparation, etc. so naturally we want to arrange the best thing that we can, and that makes it hard to make a decision.  sometimes you just have to make yourself decide.  what i try to do is put in some good amount of research, consider all my options, and if nothing seems like the clear winner then i set a date by which i HAVE to decide and even if i’m only leaning toward one option 5% more than the other, i go with it.  otherwise you’ll make yourself crazy.  the suggestion about having another friend hold you accountable is also helpful.  also, you said deadlines are hard for you – there are websites that offer timeline and checklist features.  have you looked at theknot.com?  you put in your date, and it calculates how many things you need to do each month (and puts them in order).  you can still bypass something if you want, or cross it off if it doesn’t apply to you, or add things in – but that way when it says “start your favors”, you don’t put it into the do it later pile.  just follow the list.  good luck!

Post # 8
376 posts
Helper bee

i feel overwhelmed and in a million directions also. i feel like i have a ton of tasks half done. i also second guess everything, make a decison and then find something “better” and agonize over changing it or not, and money lost. its so hard to plan the “perfect” day.



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