Post # 1
Do ordinary people still register for fine china? Crystal glassware? And silver flatware?
As I have become an adult and been a guest at many weddings, and actually been faced with the reality of planning my wedding and forming a household…The idea of asking people for expensive gifts seems a bit silly. But, my sister and my mother have insisted that its really important to create the registry. And my sister has sent out the bridal shower invitations…so now the registry is out there…
I had always imagined that I would register for a set of fine china, matching serving pieces, and nice glassware and flatware (maybe not real silver)…but, while putting together my registry, it just doesn’t seem to be a good idea.
Mostly, I’m concerned about the cost…I actually doubt that many of my guests will be spending more than $150 on a gift for my wedding. In fact, I certainly hope they don’t! My fiance and I are paying for the bulk of the wedding ourselves, and it’s not going to be what has become the traditional all-night steak-and-open bar extravaganza…it’s going to be small and modest. Even the least expensive ‘fine china’ place settings I’ve looked at start at $75 per place setting. And most of those I don’t really like at all. I would say $100 per place setting is pretty standard. Most people are going to spend $100 max on a gift…I doubt that they’ll want to get one place setting as their only gift…but what if one or two people do decide just to give one place setting as a gift? Then I will have one or two lone place settings…and I certainly won’t be able to spend the $500+ to copmlete the set any time soon…
At the same time, I do appreciate the somewhat romantic idea of establishing your household with a beautiful set of fine china that will become a family heirloom…bringing it out at every holiday and special occaision, and passing it onto my children/grandchildren. It’s seems like a more dignified gift than a blender or a set of bath towels. I could go buy those things myself any day of the week…I don’t need fine china…but then again…I don’t really NEED anything on the registry….
Post # 2
Fine China and crystal, yes. Every registry I’ve seen lately has included them. Silver, not so much. It’s so so so so so so expensive.
We didn’t register for China or crystal, because I already have a set of China that I inherited, and we’re not crystal people. Plus, I’ll inherit a set of silver eventually.
Post # 3
Instead of silver, why not ask for a high quality set of Japanese stainless steel? It is harder wearing than silver, easier to clean, and often has a similar, attractive finish.
Post # 4
Unlesss you have the place to store all those things and really plan on using them, I found that over time it was a waste to have it all. My sister (married 35+ years), has used hers only once. I asked her what she was saving it for and she really had no answer. My Mom only used hers for Holiday dinners, but once the family expanded, she really didn’t have enough of anything (and the pattern was discontinued). Once we numbered over 30, NONE of us have the space nor the desire to have so many things that get used only occasionally.
I just got rid of both mine and my Mom’s when we moved in December. What I loved while in my 20’s is not what I love now. If you decide on getting anything, I’d suggest getting something pretty plain and simple so you don’t get tired of it and so it will go with everything once your taste changes (and it will).
Post # 5
We actually opted to not register for all of the above. At this point in our lives we don’t think we need them and would rather have some other basics that we could use over fine china. When/If we do need them, we will just buy them on our own. We just registered for nice dishes, flatware, and serveware that we can use everyday.
Post # 6
Lots of ordinary people register for fine china, crystal, and flatware. I think your thought of the average price of a gift is correct, and yes, individually they may only purchase one or two settings. There is the possibility of being given just a few for your wedding, but in my experience with multiple friends’ weddings, I think it is rare to get very few. As a single chick, I picked a white bone china for my everyday dishes when I got my first apartment. My grandma, mother, and aunt purchased pieces of it for me for Christmas, and my birthday for several years. I don’t have a 12 piece set yet, but since that wasn’t necessary it wasn’t a big deal. Actually, I have a more complex set, because after they purchased enough for me to have a basic set they chose to diversify my collection with accessories like soup tureens, platters, a teaset, and ice cream dishes that are segments of my pattern’s collection. It’s still available and when I do register I’ll be able to finish the set very easily!
Post # 7
My friend recently got married and she registered for very nice silverware. Several guests got her one or two settings each and she ended up with all of them. Some guests (especially older ones) really like giving those traditional gifts. If you like the idea of having it and you will use it, then go for it!
FWIW, some people really use it. For example, I inherited my great grandmother’s silver. It’s the only silverware I own, so I use it every day, lol.