Firing a bridesmaid… have you done it? How is it done?

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
11598 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Why did you ask her to be a bridesmaid in the first place?  It sounds like you never really liked her to begin with.

If you’re ready to end the friendship, just be honest with her.  If you want to salvage the friendship, you’ll have to deal with her behavior, since you’re the one who asked her to be a bridesmaid in the first place. 

Post # 4
1662 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

YogaFaerie:  I considered firing one, but didn’t want to totally burn that bridge and so I didn’t. It was one of the biggest stressors about the wedding. I wish I could go back in time and never ask that person.

We were best friends, but he (I had a man of honour instead of a maid of honour) just got more and more clingy and emotional about the whole thing… To the point I was managing his emotions more than my own or my husbands! After my wedding, I showed him my new drivers license and he BURST into tears. I get that he’s happy for me (I think he is, anyways) but DUDE, GET IT TOGETHER. I’m not crying, why are you crying at EVERYTHING??

And he threw a major tantrum about one of my other bridesmaids, which she did not deserve, and proceeded to talk about her behind her back no matter how many times I told him to leave me out of it. He repeatedly tried to drag me in. My MIL (whom I was somewhat close to) actually passed away during our engagement, and I really did not appreciate all of the self centered drama going on at the same time. 

In your case, I’d fire her but try to do it as nicely as possible. I know you are not exactly interested in keeping up a friendship, but it’s always best to err on the side of kindness. Maybe she’s dealing with some stuff. But that doesn’t give her a free pass to stomp all over everyone.

I’m still somewhat friends with my MOH. He was going through some things, and he’s doing better now… But we are nowhere near as close as we were. It was 6 months ago, and honestly I’m still annoyed.

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