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I'm an older first time bride and this whole "first look" thing is new to me. I understand it's so you can take pictures beforehand so they won't take to long after the wedding.
I just really like the thought of my FI seeing me for the first time as I'm walking down the aisle. I guess I'm just old school but I really like the tradition of it. On the other hand I completely understand the convenience of the "first "look"
Which do you do?
We're not only doing it for convenience, though I do really love that aspect. The idea, to me, is more about the intimacy of it. You get to see eachother for the first time JUST the two of you, with the photographer catching those looks and moments. It just seemed really special to me, and that's what we're doing.
Granted, we're not super traditional, and will be walking down the aisle hand in hand. :)
We're being super traditional and not doing a first look. No one will see me other than the bridal party and our parents before I walk down the isle.
I'm currently debating about this...I hadn't planned on doing a first look because I want the special moment as I walk down the aisle. But in talking to our potentials photographers I am unsure because I want to make sure we get enough pictures of us and they aren't too rushed. But in my friend's wedding last weekend my favorite part of the ceremony was watching the groom's reaction as he saw his bride for the first time. So I'm still on the fence!
We thought about doing a first look, but my fiance was the one who didn't want to do it. He really wanted that experience of seeing me for the first time as I walk down the aisle. I guess I can't complain with that!
I do agree with most people that it makes logisitic sense to do a 1st look. It would speed things up with getting to reception. However, I just can't do it. I think its fine for other people to do it, but I can't see it for myself.
We're doing a first look. I've been to so many weddings where the bride & groom have missed a huge chunk of the party - neither of us want to do that!
I want to see the look on his face when I come down the aisle, not before :) I understand doing it the other way around, but it's just not for us!
I've even heard of doing a "first look" in your ceremony venue - - with your parents in the first row, your bridal party standing up front and your man waiting up front as you "walk down the aisle". . . all before the actual ceremony.
Why anyone would want to do this first look thing is beyond me! Maybe I am old school too. I think it takes away from the anticipation! Geez and people really get carried away with the photos. This day is about your love for one another, do we really have to spend thousands of dollars to do this? I loved the anticipation my husband had on his face, and the just "I can't wait to see her". I think it is totally worth it to just wait till you walk your beautiful self down the aisle!
We did a first look and loved it. I've said it before but he did not shed a tear during our first look and he criiiiiied when I walked down the aisle. There is a difference between "hey you look so pretty" and "holy sh*t we're getting married"
@atalante: We still missed 80% of cocktail hour
We did a first look before the wedding with pictures and I would do it again with no hesitation. We got the best pictures from that time and it helped with the nerves walking down the aisle.
In Jewish weddings it is traditional for the bride and groom to see each other before the ceremony, so NOT doing a first look would be untraditional for me...
@LGenz: I am hell-bent on that not happening. I will go bridezilla if I must! ;) ....but I'll prepare myself for the possibility.
We did't see eachother until we walked down the aisle. We got some pictures after the ceremony and then a bunch in our Day After session. I did do a first look with my dad that was simply priceless!
I never heard of "the first look" before the actual ceremony until I started planning for my wedding. I did like the idea of doing "the first look" because it will just be my FI and I and I would love to see the look on his face. Plus, I like the advantage of getting some pics out of the way. However, when I told my FI about this idea he gave me this look as if saying "are you crazy?", lol! My FI is VERY superstitious and said he really wants to experience seeing me for the first time as I walk down the aisle.
We're not doing a first look either. I don't get it. To me, it's miss 45 minutes of a party, or miss the only time I'll get to see that look on my soon-to-be husband's face. And I think it'll be different during the ceremony than it would be anywhere else. Anyway, we're taking our pictures with just the two of us after the reception, so the first look wouldn't help in that respect.
Plus, I want him to cry when I come down the aisle, so I need everything to hit him at once - how pretty I look *and* the fact that we're getting married. :-)
We won't be doing a first look. I am so happy as this is one of the few things we've agreed on from the start! haha. I can't wait to see his face when he sees me for the first time. I know it will make me cry. Not that I'm looking forward to crying...
I LOVE the pictures of me walking down the aisle and DH seeing me.... I'm SO glad we didn't do the first look, even though we didn't get "as many" pics b/c we had less time.. the ones we did, IMO, are so much more emotion filled.
@LGenz: I like that explanation very much.
We're not spending a lot of money on photos nor do we want a huge amount of good photos, but my anxiety over walking down the aisle and being the centre of attention will floor me if I don't see FI first. Of course we'll take photos during our first look, but we're private people and it's more about getting our loveydoveycraziness/my anxiety out of the way where and when we feel free to express the greatness of the whole event. I wish it wasn't so, but I won't feel free to express all my emotions in front of everyone on the walk down the aisle, no matter how much I feel it. I bet I would hold it back and so would he. So first look it is, for us.
We did a first look and I loved it. DH didn't want to do it at first but he lost a bet so we did. (In the end he said he was glad we did.) It gave us a chance to relax and talk to each other. We then took a bunch of group pictures plus we had the chance to spend 30 minutes at a location about 5 minutes away. If we hadn't done the first look we wouldn't have gotten nearly as many pictures because we still missed about 3/4 of the cocktail hour taking family pictures and pictures around the venue.
I'm glad to read so many Bees aren't doing / didn't do first looks.
It seems so common in wedding these days (my photographer asked when, not if we are doing one), but FH and I are dead set against it.
I wanted to take pics @ my fav beach so we did our first look and some of our couple of pictures @ that location.
Having our first look was very calming for me since our timeline was seriously shot and I was in a Bridezilla meltdown. And our First Look didn't take away from when we first saw each other while I was walking down the aisle. It was an entirely different moment and soo precious. We were getting married. We were both soo happy and ready to get the show on the road.
I'm doing a first look with pics before the ceremony. We're going to get as many pics outta the way as we can beforehand. Our ceremony is at 4, then cocktail hour is right at 5 and it is in the same place (all in different hotel ballrooms), so we don't want to miss out on everything! And by everything I mean the food and drinks in our private bridal party suite while everyone else is enjoying cocktail hour haha
More than convenience, unless you have a long drive to your reception in a private limo with your sweetie, your first look will be the only non-insane, just-about-the-two-of-you-and-not-your-guests time you get all night.
I wasn't sure if I wanted to give up the big down-the-aisle reveal either, but I'm glad that we did. I was relaxed and more "present" for our ceremony. It's still such a BFD when you walk down the aisle that even though he's seen you in your dress at this point, he's still seeing you walk towards him to say "I do" which is really a bigger deal than just how you look in your dress...It's still a breathtaking moment and way bigger than the first look.
Our first look pics ended up being, for the most part, throw away crap, but I'm still glad that we had that time.
Everybody likes it the way they did it. Nobody who did a first look will ever say they wish they hadn't, and nobody who waited til they went down the aisle will say "I regret not doing a first look!" It's a sweet moment regardless of when it happens. I was a maniac about my groom not seeing me before the second I walked into the chapel, because it was just my preference that we not see each other til then. Do whatever you're most comfortable with; you will be very happy either way.
@ohheavenlyday: Very true! No one regrets their way.
Although, I have to say that if I hadn't done a first look, I think the big reveal would have been spoiled b/c all of my guests saw me on my way into my waiting room. It wasn't really as much of a bummer as it sounds like it would be though. It's really all good on your wedding day.
I'm glad someone has raised this topic because I'm considering whether to do a "first look" or not.
For me, I think @bananejaune best described what I'm thinking - doing it to get over nerves together. I've actually been to (as a guest) a wedding that didn't happen, and I think just having a few minutes to say "Ok, we're both here, everything is going to go alright, we're together" is important to me. Then I can retreat to my bridal suite and relax and wait my turn to walk down the aisle. That's my reason for considering it. Otherwise, I think I'll just be in that room freaking out - if the whole point of the wedding is togetherness, maybe we can start working on it early?
That said, I do like the idea of the real "first look" being with our family and friends. So, I'm still undecided.
@luvmyDwight: I have a great compromise for you. We did a "First Touch" instead of a "First Look" because we, too, wanted to preserve the moment of him first seeing me walk down the aisle. This way, we had the magical moment captured of us connecting together privately without seeing each other, *and* the added bonus of some photos beforehand of just us, as well as each of us with our separate bridal party gang (me with my bridesmaids, him with his groomsmen.) This gave us a jump on our photos. We took photos post-ceremony, too. (My sweet husband was gently crying here. Awww! :) )
I love the idea of a first look photo before the ceremony. It's definitely a more intimate moment (although you could argue that a moment between two people in a room full of others is just as or more intimate). I plan to do a first look photo before the ceremony and get all of the other pictures out of the way before the ceremony. I want to be able to enjoy my party!
@Cornflakegirl: I love this! But how did you two resist the urge to turn around and look at each other?
My cousin had two photographers and one captured the expressions of the groom as my cousin walked down the aisle. The series of photos are wonderful and I think they would have been missed during a first look shoot. After seeing those pictures, I think I would rather wait to see each other walking down the aisle.
I think it will be even more special for my FI and I to see each other privately, when we can have a relaxed moment to kiss, hug and talk to each other. I think the walk down the aisle will also still be butterfly-inducing for the both of us too! Plus, having all the pictures taken before the ceremony means that we can actually relax and mingle with guests during our own cocktail hour and reception.
I was worried people would harp on us about not avoiding each other until the ceremony, but actually his parents and even the pastor who are all very traditional love the idea of a first look, even though they've never heard of it! Also, a bunch of people told me they love that we'll actually be at the cocktail hour instead of off taking pictures like they're used to from most other weddings.
We went traditional, and I wouldn't change it for anything, especially after seeing this pic:
@luvmyDwight: Like some others have stated, one of my very favorite moments during a wedding is to watch the groom's face when he sees his bride for the first time. I, too, was torn about what to do because of this.
In spite of this, my FI and I decided to do a first look so that we could have most of the pics finished before the ceremony, so that we'd be able to enjoy the party. We also loved the idea of having time to really absorb the moment of first seeing each other privately, without anyone but the photographer and videographer there to capture the moment. (Unfortunately, due to a number of factors that put us behind schedule on the day of our wedding, we were not able to accomplish having most of the photos taken before the ceremony, and we missed the entire hors d'oeuvre hour and most of the reception taking pics.)
However, I am still glad we did the first look for a very practical reason: I walked down the aisle after 6 p.m. at my outdoor ceremony, and the sun was shining SOOO brightly into my soon-to-be-DH's eyes that he couldnt really even see me! So, anyone who was looking at him to see his reaction to me would have only seen him squinting, and, if we had not done the first look, he really wouldn't have had a good look at me at all until later in the ceremony when we turned to face each other for our vows.
@Cornflakegirl: Oh my gosh! You looked amazing!! I love your dress and your "up do" as well as the look on your face. Gorgeous picture!
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