Post # 1
Sort of a silly dilemma but advice/experiences would be welcome here! So FI and I had our hearts set on not seeing each other prior to the ceremony – it is just one of those old, traditional ideas that we have held onto. Well, today we met with our photographer and venue coordinator, both of whom are strongly encouraging the first look due to time constraints and now we’re a bit confused on what we should do.
Our ceremony and reception are at the same site, thereby limiting the time we have between to take photos (unless of course we want to miss all of cocktail hour and the opportunity to mingle with our guests). It’s at a golf course on a lake with a million awesome photo opportunities – but they’ll take time to do. We really want the awesome photos and the freedom to mingle with our guests post-ceremony, but are a bit concerned that the first look takes away a bit of the special moment feel while walking down the aisle.
For the bees who have done a first look, are you happy you did so or do you wish you had waited to see each other until the walk down the aisle?
Post # 3
We thought about a first look, all the rational is there, it makes the most sense to do but I just can’t bring myself to do it. I want the “classic” first seeing each other walking down the aisle. That being said, I’ve never heard someone say they regret there first look. I think its just a personal decision.
Post # 4
We are doing it. We aren’t traditional. We aren’t getting married in a church so there is no coming through the double doors. I don’t see how his first look will be any different before or during the ceremony. It should be the same look right? Probably not for my FI. I doubt he will get emotional in front of all of his manly Irish cousins. I’m sure he will react way differently in private. ^_^ Plus, it will give us time to get lots of great shots before the ceremony and then we don’t have to make our guests wait an hour or so while we are off getting photos done.
Post # 5
We did a first look for the same reason…wanted to get all the family portraits and stuff out of the way before the ceremony.
It was such an emotional moment…my husband started crying and couldn’t catch his breath for like 15 minutes…I’m glad it was private, between the two of us. It would have been too overwhelming to experience that in front of a roomful of people.
That moment between the two of us is my favorite memory of the day.
Post # 6
We’re doing it for the same reasons listed in the posts above. BUT, if you’re totally against it, then why do it? I don’t feel like it takes away from the feeling at all, though. I think it makes it more intimate and special because it’s just the two of you – which is the point of the whole day. He’ll still have a reaction during the ceremony of course. Different contexts. I don’t know anyone that has regretted doing it – I do know of a few people that wish they had so they didn’t spend so much time taking pictures.
Post # 7
My experience was that the first look was my favorite part of the day! I really enjoyed seeing my husband before the ceremony. I was really nervous before seeing him, but afterwards, I was calm and felt prepared to get married. We also had our ceremony and reception at the same location. The practicality of taking pictures before the wedding ceremony was really what pushed us to make the decision to do a first look, but I’m so glad we did!
Post # 8
We did a first look. The first time you see each other is special no matter where you are. It really helped to take away some of the nerves, plus it was great to have it as a really special moment of just the two of us (plus a team of photographers and cinematographers, LOL!) rather than us plus 150 guests staring at us. I wouldn’t have traded that hour or so alone for anything, it was amazing.
Post # 9
Thanks for pointing out the glaring obvious that I somehow missed! I hadn’t even thought about the point that the first time he sees me, it’s going to be special, regardless of whether it’s during the ceremony or at a pre-determined place for a first look.
I had been picturing it to be just like getting ready for any other big occasion – I get ready, he gets ready, I come out of the bathroom, he says I look nice, and off we go. lol, clearly I wasn’t thinking this through!
Now that I have it in the correct perspective, I am feeling much better about it and actually really like the idea of having an intimate moment when we first see each other! Thanks!
Post # 10
i would check out this thread – it has a lot of opinions and sample pictures http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/debating-the-first-look
Post # 11
It’s not a silly dilemma at all! There have actually been several threads about it. Maybe you can search the boards for “first look” and browse some of them. Bees have brought up several pros and cons and have shared their own experiences and shared their first look photos. You can take a look at these and decide if it’s right for you:
Post # 12
@andy113: and @meliss: Thanks!!! Those previous posts really helped a lot! Looking at the pictures of other people’s first look of course got me all choked up, and now I have gone from being hesitant about a first look, to being SOOO excited about having one!
BTW, your first look pictures are absolutely gorgeous!!!! Definitely has me sold on the idea!
Post # 13
@Ree723: It’s the photos on Weddingbee that got me REALLY excited about our first look, too! 🙂
Post # 14
As a wedding photographer I can tell you that my clients who chose to do a first look LOVE the images from that part of the day. It is private, just between the couple, and very intimate and beautiful. Plus, when you walk down the isle you don’t lose the excitement, it just transforms to a different sort of excitement. I don’t know any couple who has regretted the decision to do a first look. I would say go for it! Talk is over with your fiancee and and do what makes the both of you most comfortable.
Post # 15
Im anticipating the First Look! I need it before going down that aisle to meet him!
Post # 16
For me…I want to wait until I walk down that isle. That’s how I’ve always thought of it in my head. I think my man is a little less traditional but oh well. Go with your gut and your heart. Can you take pictures of each other afterwards? You can take pics of youself in the cool spots and the same for him at different times. I don’t think they should pressure you at all…go w/your guts and still go for the great photos. If you miss 15 min’s of time w/people so what you have the time at dinner to mingle! Good luck!