Post # 1
Okay Bees! I’m scared! I’ve been engaged a whopping few weeks and I’ve already had what I call my first mini-bridezilla moment!!
Within a week of sharing the news with my mother she was blowing up my Facebook wall and hers with Mother of the Bride dresses she was going to wear to my wedding in October. Mind you, at this point, the official date hadn’t been set and I was still even trying to wrap my head around it all.
Then a few days later my grandma called and was asking me details, to which I had to talk slowly so she could take notes… on everything… right down to what the groomsmen would be wearing. Not 20 minutes after we get off the phone (in which I also told her that my mom was stressing me out with what she was going to wear), she’s messenging me a link on my Facebook of a dress she wants to wear and asks me to send the link to my mother as well!!
I lost it. Luckily I was home alone, but I screamed just a smidge.
I get it. Everyone is VERY excited! FI and I have been together for over 7 years, I’m the only granddaughter, I get it. Excitement.
BUT I DON’T EVEN HAVE MY DRESS YET, NOR HAVE I TRIED ONE ON. The date isn’t finalized. The venue isn’t finalized. What do I care what YOU’RE going to wear?!?!
I think honestly, the most stressful part is the fact that there are many things about this wedding that I don’t have a priority for, and therefore aren’t stressing about, and what OTHER people wear, is definitely not on that list of stressors. Especially when I have zero idea how I want to look on the big day. Everyone else’s over the top excitement is making me feel a little overwhelmed. And like I said… we’re only a few weeks in.
Anybody else have a mini rant to share? No judgements!
Post # 3
@MargaritaVille: I think my first bridezilla moment was when I didn’t want to share the name of my venue on Facebook, knowing that we have a really long engagement and that someone we know might book an earlier wedding OR on the day we wanted. As it is, it’s a diamond in the rough-type place that no one really knows about. I still haven’t shared it–I have mutual friends with ex-FI, and they’re planning their wedding, too. The last thing I want is for them to plan their wedding there, too. I know I am being entirely irrational.
For the record, I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all.
Post # 4
I had a mini-meltdown because of a bridesmaid that refused to order her dress. They were on sale and being clearanced and she had plenty of money, but she just wouldn’t order it! (She’s going to be 8 months pregnant and was sad she couldn’t wear the same sheath dress as everone else, which I understood. Even told her to ask her mom, who can sew, if we ordered a bigger one, just to make room for the belly. But after a trip to the store, found an empire waist that was perfect, or so I thought. Needless to say, I thought the whole thing had been decided.) When I found out, I yelled then felt better. LOL
I’m about to have one over my own dress… ugh!
Post # 5
Yup, when B’s dad and brother had their own list of business invites for the wedding. I still haven’t managed that one but am hoping to do so soon.
Post # 6
@EffieTrinket: No, I know what you mean as well. Everytime I let a little bit of information slip I feel like I’m losing a piece of my soul. I just want to plan it my way, and do what I want, and keep as many opinions out of it as possible. I’m only letting big ideas out at this point in time – general location, date, colors, and telling people WELL in advance that it will be a cocktail hour reception, not a meal. I suppose that’s a lot to divulge, but those are the bigs, the basics, and anything beyond that (with the exception of to my maid-of-honor) I feel weird talking about.
@bluebelle23: I’m trying on dresses for the first time next week and I’m sooooo nervous! There’s so many options and it’s so overwhelming. And I know that this may sound like bragging, believe me it’s not, but I’m fortunate enough to have a body type that most everything will look nice, and I just KNOW it’s going to make the dress hunt so much harder. I’m not a very big girly girl, and the thought of trying on all these formal gowns is kind of stressing me out, let alone having to PICK one for a day that’s 9 months out! AHH!
Post # 7
My bridezilla moment came when trying on dresses at David’s Bridal, about two months into wedding planning. I won’t lay out all the details, but let’s just say I never went back and will never, ever, recommend that store location to anyone. As soon as I got home I went into bridezilla mode on a feedback email. Got a call from the manager a few days later. I have no regrets, nor do I feel bad!
Post # 8
when the shop randomly ordered one bridesmaids dress completely wrong i had a moment!! Id ordered and paid for 4 dresses in the same style, so all the bridesmaids had to do was go and get fitted (as i live abroad and two bridesmaids were out of town when i was back in london”
when i read the confirmation email “we have ordered 3 dresses in ___ style and 1 dress in ___ style” i got uber stressed. forwarded my earlier email saying 4 dresses, same style with a little message that was polite but had serious undertones of stress and ‘woman on the edge’. especially since 3 were long and chiffon, and this extra one was short and satin…completely different!!!
also when i realised id have to change venue 2 months before wedding (ie last week) and lose a deposit since we wouldnt have enough guests for the minimum consumption i felt like i might lose my mind. luckily my new venue is awesome and im really happy with it
Post # 9
I haven’t gotten into the super important details yet. We have a guest list and a venue. I felt a bridezilla moment coming on when after I got off the phone with my mother, telling her that there will be no children allowed, I texted my sister immediately (2.5 minutes if that) to let her know and to explain it has nothing against her kid or her but it’s an evening wedding and I want the adults to be able to enjoy themselves. My sister responded that it wasn’t a problem for her but that my mother already told her. REALLY?!?! ok whatever. Then my sister continues to text me the entire night telling how my mother and father are dicussing in front of her how unreasonable I am being with my guest list and that I’m tearing the family apart. Because I’m not inviting my dad’s brother or my mom’s sister that I havent seen in over 10 years and neither make an effort to contact me?
A little back story on the family. Growing up my dad went through long periods of time where he was either not speaking to his father or not speaking to his mother. My mother was doing the same thing between her sister and her father. If one of them was not being spoken to us children had no connection with them either. I’m not attached to any one in my family because of this. My father still does not speak to his brother because his brother took his father’s side in the divorce, but yet I’m being told that I should invite him anyway? This made me want to scream.
Post # 10
@hma812: Gross! I’m sorry you’re going through that.
Not as stressful – but just the other night FI’s mother was asking who we would be inviting from his father’s side of the family (they’re separated). We told her just his Father and Grandmother. She’s like, “you have to invite your Cousin A”. I just looked at FI and said “who is cousin A?” Apparently she’s important enough to invite, but I’ve never met… in 7+ years. And, he didn’t even mention her. Needless to say, Cousin A won’t be getting an invite.
Post # 11
This is going to sound horrible and I know it is. Between FI and I we have 4 kids. We are having a mini wedding (FI, Me, two people to witness) due to a deployment and then later a vow renewal with our families.
Well I had decided that since it was during a school day and I didnt want the kids to miss school and since we were going to have a larger ceremony at the end of the school year, I didnt want to invite the children to the civil ceremony. Im gonna be stressed as it is with no one there to and I really didnt want to get four kids ready just to go down and stand in line at the courthouse with all four of them.
Also FI’s daughter has ADHD and any change in her schedule makes her unbearable. FI decides he wants the kids there and I know I cant blame him, but we have to stand in line for perhaps hours to even get married and I really didnt want the kids to have to stand there too. There is no seating where we will be waiting.
We got into a huge argument about it. I said whats the big deal since we are doing a bigger wedding after the deployment and they will be apart of it. This was just to get the legal part done before another deployment.
He thinks Im a bridezilla now.
Post # 12
I had a mini bridezilla moment over my twin picking a BM dress with all the same elements as my wedding dress. >< She ended up picking something else thank heavens!
Post # 13
@TexasSpringBride: Oohh! Touchy subject, but I definitely side with you on this one. You’re going to the courthouse specifically because you want to be legally married now and it is the path of least resistence. Kind of defeats the purpose if you bring them. I understand his side, and I understand that his children are very important to him, but I also understand the impracticality of pulling them out of school for the event.
Post # 14
@MrsVandykins: Not going to lie, I probably would too. It’s the ONE time you get to really separate yourselves and be viewed as individuals.
Post # 15
@MargaritaVille: Exactly. Its just the legal part, not as if we arent going to have a bigger thing later. The thing for me was that there is no seating, we will be waiting in line and his daughter has ADHD. My kids were okay with not being there since there is a later ceremony.
I called the courthouse before we had the argument and they told us even had we scheduled we would have been looking at a 2 hour minimum and they stopped doing scheduling at the first of the year. Its first come first serve. I was thinking we could get there early, however I had a day off the other day and I stopped by the courthouse to see what the lines were like. They were lined up outside the door at 7 a.m. in the morning and one couple had been there for 4 hours and they were one of the first in line.
You have to wait til the JOP or Judge has time to fit you into his schedule for the day.
So I definitely didnt want to stand in line with four kids for 4 hours while we are waiting. Have you ever seen a child with ADHD have to stand in line for 4 hours waiting. Its not pretty.
Post # 16
@MargaritaVille: This totally happened to me! XD Everyone else’s excitement and inquiries in the first few weeks was just absolutely overwhelming. 😀 I didn’t know ANYTHING about the wedding, because I wasn’t the type of girl/girlfriend to have a wedding binder for the inevitable. 😛 I had nothing planned, so when people wanted to interject what they wanted, even for themselves, I just couldn’t handle it. 😛