Weddingbee boards

Hey y'all! I don't usually post about serious things, but I figured some of you might be able to relate better than my friends. My mom was in poor health for the last 5 years (three heart attacks, a stroke and countless trips to the emergency room and ICU) and was failing for about the last year. She was in good health for my wedding last year, and I'm so grateful. I think she held on because she was so looking forward to it. 

Two months ago my mom went to the hospital again with massive heart failure. She was on a ventilator for a month and really out of it. She slowly deteriorated with a lot of ups and downs until a few days before we were going to take her off life support, she passed away in her sleep. I'm the oldest, and my family depended on my mom for everything, so I've shouldered a ton of responsibility for my little brother, who's still in college, my Dad, for whom my mom took care of, my other brother, who deployed to Afghanistan last week and my mom's three businesses. I also live 5 hours away from where my family lives. I also planned the funeral and all the arrangements. 

So the last month has been really hard and after last weekend I thought I was on the upswing. Easter was my birthday and I went on a trip to New Orleans with my husband that my mom was looking forward to for me--she loved for me to tell her about adventures. We used to talk almost every day. It made me sad to not be able to tell her all about it.  And this weekend is Mother's day. I love my mother-in-law dearly, I'm so blessed to have her. And my in-laws are wonderful. But I'm still dreading Mother's Day. I start getting choked up just thinking about it. It's going to be really hard. I feel like now that things are getting back into a normal routine, I should be better--but I'm more emotional now than when things were crazy! I don't know how to talk to my friends about it because I know it will bring people down. I have two acquaintences that have lost their mom's and we talk a bit on Facebook. I feel like I'm in this club of girls who have lost their moms now. It's really strange.

Anyway sorry for the long post. I just wondered if there are any other bees having a hard time without your moms? How are you dealing with Mother's Day?