Post # 1
Hey everybody, I’m getting married in 10 days! My wife to be will have been on birth control over 2 months by the time we get married but her doctor didn’t tell her that she had to start it on the day after her period ends, so she started it on a random day until she found out. So it didn’t take effect immediately. I asked my fiancee just now if she had to start over or if she just kept taking pills in the same order she was supposed to. She said she didn’t remember. She did talk to her nurse who said that the earliest the pills could kick in would be the day after her next period – which happens to be the day after we get married.
I love my fiancee like crazy and don’t want to upset her but I wish she had a better understanding of how this worked. Now she will be on her last day of her period on our wedding (the 21st) and the pill, according to her nurse, will not possibly have started working effectively until the day after our wedding, at the earliest. Thanks for reading through all this background information to get to the meet of the subject. I need some advice!
We are considering using spermicide only for the first time we have sex. She has had penetrative sex before, 6 years ago in highschool, this will be my first time, though we’ve had a lot of oral together to ease into things. So, spermicide only on the last day of her period. Yay or nay? Also, I will not have had an orgasm for 3 weeks at this point. She said it would be good for me to feel everything to the fullest, even if it means I don’t last long at all, we want to have multiple multiple rounds haha yes! I have read that you’re less fertile if you haven’t gotten off in several weeks due to all the old sperm. Not sure if that was true. We plan on using a condom after our first time together and each time after that until we know for sure that the pill is working.
Thanks for reading this!
Post # 3
Use a backup method if it will make you more comfortable, but she should be absolutely fine.
Post # 4
You’ll be fine. Use a backup if you want more peace of mind, though.
Post # 5
shes probably fine but unless you are willing to risk getting pregnant that first time when you DON’T use one, just use one. It’s not worth the risk and really the logic doesn’t make sense. You’re going to come fast no matter what most likely because you’ve never had sex and it will still feel great. It’s not like its your one chance in life to feel the skin to skin contact. Better than having egg to sperm contact!
Post # 6
@bjh293: I’m in the same situation (except we are going to go without a condom for the first time on our honeymoon) and I havent started taking the pill yet. I just read this.
Post # 7
Like everyone else said, she will probably be fine, but if you want to use backup to ease your minds, I’d recommend condoms over spermicide. Spermicide causes UTIs and that would definitely ruin your honeymoon!
Post # 8
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
Pull and pray!!
jk. but really, you’d be fine
Post # 9
I’m under the understanding that the pill is effective 7 days after you start using it for the first cycle. That way, any egg that was released is now gone, and the pill will prevent any further eggs. Since she started mid-way though a cycle, that cycle was probably a bit unusual but it sounds like she took a whole additional cycle and will have her second “period” right before the wedding, am I right? If so, she’s protected to the full extent of the pill ie. 98-99%.
If you’re unsure, read the information insert that comes in the pill box. They very clearly explain when to start taking it at the begining and how long it takes for full efficacy.
Post # 10
@_honeybird: +1 I hate spermicide, If she easily get’s UTI’s I wouldn’t reccomend it.
@bjh293: Don’t be frustrated with her. I started taking it when I was 16 and it took me a long time to get used to taking it, remembering, knowing how it works, etc. It makes a lot of women have really bad emotional side effects too. I hated the pill.
Anyway, you should be covered. If your not comfortable use a back up, but consider her medical history before deciding on spermicide.
Post # 11
I think condoms are more reliable than spermicide. I also found spermicide rather unpleasant to apply, (but then maybe guys feel the same way about putting on a condom 🙂
Also you’ll need to use lube, and many condoms are lubricated, which will help.
Anyway, it’s just small sacrifices until the pill is definitely working. Sex takes a while to get good at anyway, so when you go off the condom (or spermicide) it’ll just be another way the sex improves after the first month. Good on you for waiting and have a great wedding and honeymoon!