FI's family wants to stay at my place with me the night before the wedding

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 2
45254 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

emilythehutt: ” I’m sorry, there must have been a misunderstanding. We had planned for you to stay at my place the night of the wedding. We have other plans for the night before. Would you like me to make you a reservation at the hotel, or would you prefer to make it yourself?”

Post # 3
4628 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

emilythehutt:   You are not being a b****, at all.  It is perfectly reasonable to want a quiet night ahead of your big day and a considerate family member would realize that.  

What  julies1949:  wrote is perfect.  

Post # 4
1304 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

You’re definitely not being a b. You don’t want to have to entertain guests the night before the wedding.  Politely tell them that there must have been some confusion and suggest they book a room.

Post # 5
3 posts

I stayed alone the night before my wedding, and highly recommend it.  I slept beautifully and appreciated my quiet time in the morning.  I think you just need to be honest, and tell them that you really need to have some personal time to relax and that you don’t think you’ll be able to do so with company.  If necessary, I supposed you could offer to pay for their hotel room, but I suspect you won’t need to do that.

Post # 6
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

emilythehutt:  Not at all! You do NOT want to be worried about hosting them and getting ready. You need your time and privacy on this day. Politely redirect them to a hotel. That’s nuts!

Post # 7
4027 posts
Honey bee

Good God, no!

Post # 8
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

No way; I also can’t believe anyone would be so obtuse as to think the bride wants to entertain houseguests the night before a wedding.

Stick to your guns.

Post # 9
1862 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Post # 10
1663 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

No, no, no, no. Have your FI explain that there was a misunderstanding and they need to stay at the hotel the night before. 

Post # 11
286 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I agree. Your FI should just go ahead and make a reservation for them and explain there’s been a misunderstanding.

Post # 12
303 posts
Helper bee

I think you’re finace should explain the situation intead of you having to do it especially since he will be staying at a hotel as well it makes no sense for the parents to stay with you the night before the wedding.  Is there any way you guys could pay the $99 accomodation for the parents? Maybe they can’t afford it?? and that might make things run easier and smoother.

Post # 13
12519 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

No way in hell would I have spent the night before my wedding with my inlaws.

Post # 14
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

HuysuzAyi33:  this. 1) the answer is absolutely not. 2) your FI should explain the situation, I’m sure they’d prob feel weird since he won’t be there anyway. If they actually can’t afford it, your FI should pay the room since he forgot to tell them. 

Post # 15
3344 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2013 - Rhode Island

julies1949:  +1000  You are a politeness guru!

emilythehutt:  Follow the above advice.  She said it perfectly.

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