(Closed) FI's parents want to pay for the wedding

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
660 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

its their way of showing they accept your marriage and they love you.

Look at how many bees on here don’t feel accepted or loved by their SO’s family.

Feel lucky and appericiative.

Post # 4
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@aicila: I agree. OP- take it as a very kind and generous gift. 

But, as another bee whose ILs covered a good chunk of the wedding, make sure to be graceful about accepting/declining it, and talk with FI first to have a game plan. Talk with FILs about how this will work- is there a budget? Are they just providing you two a set lump sum to work with as you wish? Do they desire (read: expect) to be involved in the planning or make the final decisions? How will splitting up the guest list go?

Discussing these things first to know if there are any strings/expectations can help keep everyone happier in the end and allow you and FI to accept or decline with full knowledge.

Post # 5
Member
338 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Wow, you’re lucky! They must like you two together or something 😉

I think what @indibee is spot on. Make sure you all are on the same page and if they’re expecting you to release all control of the wedding process and you don’t want to do that, don’t be afraid to politely decline. Always remember this is your and your fiance’s day!

Post # 6
Member
92 posts
Worker bee

I agree it’s their way to show their love to you. My FI parents will give half cost of our wedding, and I and FI will pay the other half.

Post # 8
Member
338 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

It’s very overwhelming but take a step back and breathe! Remind your self that you have got a year and a half to plan your wedding! I’m an anxious person who stresses out easily and I had a total of 7 months to plan my wedding. I’m 2.5 months out and so far, it hasn’t been CRAZY stressful so far. Just make sure you take it one thing at a time, and remember that if you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to delagate tasks! That’s what saved me. Remember that it’s not only your wedding, it’s HIS (or hers!) too, so don’t be afraid to ask him to take some of the responsibility!

Post # 9
Member
1433 posts
Bumble bee

Be happy. That is awesome!

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