Post # 1
There is a lady that my Fiance works with and I would call us “friends.”
She recently has been on a health kick (awesome!) and is trying to lose weight. The thing is every time she goes on a diet (this time it is no carbs) she does nothing but fish for compliments to the point where it is remarkably uncomfortable. She even lies about weight lost, sizes and takes photos for FB that you know are at those “special” angles. Last night I kid you not she posted about going to the bathroom and losing an additional two pounds. TMI!!!! She then posted this morning about losing a pound in her sleep and how awesome she is that she can do that while the rest of us were “just sleeping.” Really?
We had dinner with the company this past weekend and every time there was a lull in our conversation she would bring it back to her weight loss despite our previous congrats and encouragements.
If you lost 30 pounds that is freaking awesome but don’t lie to me about it. If you lost 30 pounds that is awesome too but don’t tell me your pants are one size when I clearly see that they are not and are still quite tight (label sticking out). The problem is she fibs and then forgets what she has said. I want to support her as much as I can but it is really hard to continue to be supportive when you know you are being lied to. For once I would like to be given the opportunity to congratulate her without her fishing for a congraluations.
Of course I would NEVER call her out on any of this but it does make me want to avoid her somewhat. Lord knows if I did nothing but talk about my wedding all the time I would certainly expect the same response!
Post # 3
I’m guessing that it’s pretty intentional on her part.
Ex: You lose 23lbs so you say you lost 25. All the compliments would be soo motivating.
Like, “yay, 25lbs, that’s awesome!” Not that 23 isn’t, since it’s practically the same…
But yeah, I think she’s in the “thriving off of positive feedback” stage. Posting on FB makes people compelled to comment, so she’s basically using it to her advantage.
It’s attention seeking obviously and super annoying when you know it’s a load of BS (don’t worry, I’ve got people like that on FB too), so I’m not condoning it. I’m just inclined to think that’s probably why.
Post # 4
@Treejewel19: ahhhhhhhh…this is going to be such a fun ride for you!
I had a friend who lost 65lbs in one year!!!! It was awesome & great and she looked great but OMG I wanted to kill myself all year! All she ever did was “I lost XX lbs, I am practically a size 0 now…” Dude, you’re still a size 8 (which is wonderful). It drove me insane. Oh and I had to just stop reading her statuses on FB because they made her sound like a looney.
It even got to the point where she would ask to borrow my clothes (i’m a 0) and she would not be able to fit them so she’d return them & say that they aren’t cute (why’d you borrow them then?). It got crazy…….but finally a year later she’s like a 2? and she finally feels good about herself and has STOPPED the INSANITY and fishing for compliments with lies….ahh
Post # 5
These people need the attention and are never going to stop. My best friend is a size 0/2 and constantly makes comments like “Well I need to go to the gym and burn off all the crap I ate today or I’m gonna look even fatter” and “Omg look at all this skin I can grab (on her stomach, and it’s VERY little, mind you)”. She does it all the time just so we say “Shut up, you are soooo skinny!” I have stopped feeding into it and literally don’t say anything or change the subject because yes it is very annoying. Sadly, this lady sounds like she needs the attention and isn’t going to stop.
Post # 6
Oy, what a piece of work! I actually kind of feel sorry for her, though. She’s so desperate for attention and validation that she’s resorted to making herself look ridiculous. However, feeling sorry for her still wouldn’t stop me from wanting to hang myself everytime she starts in on her self-promotion parades. What I do with people like this is I hit the “hide” button on the facebook newsfeed so I can’t see their updates anymore. In person, when she starts up these conversations, just redirect the conversation to a different topic. Good luck!
Post # 7
This reminds me of people who go into therapy and make progress–which is great for them–but then their therapy becomes essentially all they can talk about and they keep bringing it up in conversation because they want some sort of recognition for addressing their struggles.
It’s like, “What do you want? A cookie?”
Maybe you should smile at her, and say, “Congratulations on winning weight loss!!”
Post # 8
Wow I got fat after college, and lost fifty pounds the last thing I was doing while trying to get the weight off was to put any more pressure on myself by sharing it with fb, some people. I bet she is combination of shameless and shameful it’s would be a hard charade to keep up and she probably is yo yoing at least that what I I think from what you said so far.
Post # 9
Honestly, Ive told people that I find it uncomfortable when they talk about their diets around me. I dont wanna hear it. Being more healthy, sure. But not diets and how little they are eating etc.
I would just tell her that you dont want to hear it. It makes you uncomfortable.
Clearly she is insecure.
Post # 10
It sounds like she has a problem, to be that obsessed with weight. No matter what she was talking about, it would be annoying! It sounds like her personality.
Post # 11
annoying. I had a co worker like this and she drove me INSANE.
Post # 12
@TwoCityBride: Congrats! I also gained all my weight in college too (and some after too). Well done on your weight loss!
Thank you Bees.
My Fiance was telling me I was overreacting but now he is starting to realize it is uncomfortable. I really loved reading your comments as they made me feel like I’m not going crazy. 🙂
Post # 13
Annoying. I had a girl from high school find me on FB and ask me how I was doing. I responded with the requisite pleasantries and returned the question. Her next question was.. “Notice anything different?!?! What do you think?!?!!?!?”
I seriously hadn’t said a word to this girl in 8 years, and we weren’t close in high school. We played on the same softball team for middle school. She had lost a lot of weight, but I was immediately turned off of congratulating her because of this.
Don’t bite, and continue to support her efforts quietly. She needs to find confidence in her own accomplishments, or that weight will come right back.