Post # 1
Soooo annoying. More flakers during the final countdown. People are just so clueless about how much work and money goes into a wedding, especially a formal seated dinner.
I just can’t understand why we’ve come to a time in society where people can’t like take stock of their honest abilities and intentions with AT LEAST 2 WEEKS NOTICE (let alone the freaking RSVP deadline..). Be a friend, good grief!
Here I am spending time to put you at a “good table” with people you’ll like, and spending money on getting your and your date’s names printed with what you’d like to eat and having it all set up, final seating charts out to the coordinator, etc….and a few days before you’re gonna be like – oh we’d decided we don’t want to spend the money or ask off work…meanwhile, I can’t get back what I’ve already paid for you, the time I’ve spent, or the fact that you just blew a hole of silence in your table!!! What about those people? You just screwed them too.
I understand money and jobs are sensitive nowadays, but I think that you should still be able to at least give your so called friend the same courtesy you would give your job..If you want me to respect your finances, why don’t you respect mine?! 2 weeks min. Emergencies are emergencies. This does not qualify as one in my book. If you’re feeling broke or are afraid of your boss…you could probably figure that out sooner than 5 days. Just saying. I would never do this to anyone. Grraaaaaah. Okay. I’m done with this now.
Post # 3
Ugh, if those really were the reasons, I’d be pissed too! You’d think they would have requested time off before now. I put in leave requests as soon as I know about the events! As for job situations – the only time I think it’s okay is when it’s a brand new job or puts your actual employment in jeopardy. Yeesh. People are ridiculous.
Post # 4
We had 12 people not show up. I was pissed. The best part- I found out TWO days before my wedding my great-grandma, grandma (who were listed on my programs), uncle, uncle’s gf, cousin and her gf, and my BFF from high school (whom I found out via FB took a random trip to NYC with her dad the thursday before my wedding and never actual mentioned not coming and still hasn’t said a word to me about my wedding) didn’t show up. Awesomesauce. NOT.
Post # 5
@ashelaine: wow that is horrible. are you still friends? I can’t even let myself think about who might randomly not show at this point… i’ve tried to pre-empt the surprises by sending messages to my “most likely to flake” friends saying how excited I am to see them soon, so that hopefully they’ll go ahead and tell me now, or man up and show up.
Post # 6
Where is the like button ? 😉
Post # 7
@waitingwonderland: Our wedding was 2 1/2 weeks ago- I’m not really sure if we are or not. I’m pretty upset with her though- that’s for sure. She’s pretty flakey, but really I mean this was kind of a big deal. I’ve just kind of quit putting in effort- maybe when she grows up and decides the people she IS hanging around with are just using her (she’s one of those girls with all the perks- she’s friends with all the right people and has all the connections around town, so she’s contantly doing awesome stuff- and her “friends” use her for said connections).
Post # 8
I’m 4 days away and still waiting for 7 rsvps!!!!!! MIL asked one family on Sunday if they’re coming. Their answer? “Oh some of us are but we’re not sure who yet.” Well too bad, I left them 3 seats even if they are a family of 6. Theres picnic tables outside if anyone else comes.
Post # 9
If I don’t get an RSVP from someone and they decide to show up at the wedding, they can hang out in the pre-function area by themselves during the sit-down dinner. I’m not making room for someone that can’t be bothered to drop an envelope with prepaid postage in the mail. And if someone is a no-show and RSVP’d yes, I would consider that the end of our friendship (not counting something serious that would prevent them from attending at the last minute, like major illness, death in the family, or any other crazy circumstance that is beyond their control).
Post # 10
PREACH IT!!! At my cousin’s wedding last year, my uncle RSVP’d “no” verbally (after being chased down). Then just a few days before the wedding he calls to say that “surprise!” He and his daughter are coming up from Florida after all! Luckily, they were able to make it work, but that shit better not happen at my wedding.
Post # 11
@atlbride2013: YES!!!!!!! 100% spot on. at least your not afraid of saying what people are really thinking. too much sugar coating in this forum sometimes.
Post # 12
@waitingwonderland: you got married today! Congrats! I’m not married yet but I know I’d be angry if I paid $30-$40/ plate + their place card + an additional ten favors. 🙁
Post # 13
@waitingwonderland: We had about 8 total people who didn’t show up but RSVP yes (out of 200 people). It was annoying that it was $200 wasted, but MORE aggravating that it was so stressful to plan seating charts, and to have them not show after spending hours trying to make everyone happy was aggravating.
But luckily, I didn’t know until the wedding. And I was having too much damn fun by that point to care. If I had known earlier, however, I would’ve been way more pissed off! Some people who’ve never planned a wedding are clearly clueless.
Post # 14
I had four people cancel the day of, despite RSVPing yes.
Two were fair enough – one is pregnant and her doctor ordered her onto bed rest for her own health and the baby’s survival. Obviously I wasn’t going to be all, stuff your baby, get your arse to the wedding! The other played football the morning of the wedding and was sent to hospital that afternoon with a torn AC joint.
The other two – they can get stuffed. One decided he just couldn’t be bothered making the trip, and the other called me on the day asking me if I could organise a lift for her to the ceremony. On the MORNING OF MY WEDDING. I said no, unfortunately, I didn’t know anyone who lived in her area and suggested a taxi. She then asked me to research the train timetables and tell her what time to catch the train and where from. My mum saw my facial expression, grabbed the phone and hung up.
Post # 15
The good news is, at least your next party guest list has gotten smaller.
I would certainly not issue them any further invitations, and would probably take stock of our relationship.