Post # 1
So my bachelorette party is this weekend, and my MOH threw everything together, I sent her a list of ppl I wanted invited, and overall I think it was close to 30 girls invited. As of right now, there are less than 10 going. Which wouldn’t be a problem, except 3 of those ppl are my sisters, 1 is my FSIL, 1 is my mom, and 1 is my FMIL. Oh, and 1 is me. I’m not trying to complain about it just being my family mostly, but we have a whole day of events planned; tubing on a river in the AM ($9), pole dancing class in the afternoon (not sure on cost but I think it’s like $10/person), dinner and downtown in the evening, crashing at one friend’s house. I understand that cost might be an issue for some people, but it’s really not that expensive. Not to mention, I had mentioned to ppl that they could come do just a portion of the day if that’s what they wanted, that I really just wanted to be able to celebrate with my friends!
Here’s the part that is really annoying me; I have a couple of work friends that were really excited and looking forward to it about a month ago, and now all of a sudden they can’t make it. One girl texts me, then within 5 minutes the second one does, and 5 minutes later the 3rd one does. Obvious much? This is the second time they have all three flaked out on me-they did it for my bridal shower too. And on top of texting me some lame excuse (all 3 of them had diff ones) 2 of them made sure I was still down for Happy Hour (which will take place 3 days after my bach. party). Really?!!! I’ve heard every excuse out there in the past month or two for my bridal shower and now bachelorette party. Save it. Just tell me you can’t make it because I’m not buying your made up crap and it’s a lot less hurtful to just say you can’t make it than to spin a story why. And don’t tell me you’re coming, then the day before say you can no longer make it because something came up.
It’s so funny how the whole wedding planning and party processes make you realize who your true friends are, and allows people to show their true colors.
Anyone else hear every excuse in the book when it comes to your bridal showers or bachelorette parties??
Post # 3
I know what you mean. I think it’s fairly typical in situations like this, though. People don’t want to buy a gift and they don’t want to spend all day with people they don’t know. It is upsetting, though, because it is a party that is in celebration of you. RSVPing and then changing their minds last minute is really selfish.
Post # 4
That’s really annoying. Do you think they said they would go before they realized it’s an all day event? It was really nice of you to say they didn’t have to go all day but I would probably feel more awkward doing that than just skipping out.
Post # 5
OK I am going to flip this- how would you feel if your friend thought that every reason you gave for not attending something was made up? Not nice huh?
Now I know that your wedding is the most important thing in your life right now but unfortunately it is not going to everyone elses and especially people that may not be heavily invested in your life (since you refer to them as work friends rather than just friends). People have busy lives and each individual need to prioritise the events in their lives to what is most important to them (other friends, money, event situations etc).
Try not to take it personally and enjoy the day with those who do make it.
Post # 6
I love my friends, but they are really flaky. This is why I’m not planning on having any type of pre wedding parties or showers. My family all lives far away and wouldn’t be able to attend any events other than the wedding, so if I tried to plan anything local I feel I would just be disspointed. I’d rather just be happy that they come to my wedding!
Post # 7
I was a “flakey” friend to my longest friend when her bachelorette party came around, but then again I was very sick and scared with a “mystery disease” that hadn’t yet been properly diagnosed. I was constantly stressed, and felt I’d drag the mood down of the party, but more importantly, I was TERRIFIED of having severe symptoms out in public, and needing to go to the hospital. So I had to decline the invite. Sucked, but it was all true. I’d be hurt if my friend called me a “flake” over something like that. Sometimes it isn’t all garbage, but then again you know your friends best.