Post # 1
so…i have a slight problem. i asked a friend if her daughter could be my flower girl. she was delighted to say yes. i mean, this was the cutest little girl…red head, curly hair, blue eyes and so energetic…
everything was fine til last month. the girls dad was granted full custody of her, and she will not be in the wedding anymore.
a couple of questions…if we have a ring bearer, do we have to have a flower girl? i dont know anyone else who i would want to be it. and another question… the mil has told my mom that she has already lined up another flower girl…i dont know who she is talking about, she hasnt said anything to me or even talked with me about it. how do i tell her if the girl i wanted cant be it, i dont want anyone. and is she even allowed to call the shots like that?
this lady makes me want to elope like tomorrow!!!
Post # 3
Remember, it’s your wedding. It’s your choice if you want a flower girl or not. Just let her know that you (and your fiance?) have decided not to have one at all.
Post # 4
I definitely don’t think you need to have a flower girl just because you’re having a ring bearer. That’s pretty crazy. I think you’re supposed to pick children that are important to you (or that you at least know!!). I’m having my niece and nephew, but if there was only one, I would only have one… or none! It’s not a job that can just be filled by any schmoe off the street. Haha. Definitely put your foot down on this one.
Post # 5
Yipes… sorry about the drama. Take a deep breath and do what you want. You do not have to have a flower girl. Our niece will be just shy of 3 when our September wedding rolls around, so we decided it wasn’t worth the hassle of making her try and do something she may not have the engergy/attention span to handle. Instead, she’ll be dressed up and allowed to wander around as an ‘honorary’ flower girl.
So, you don’t have to have one. For your MIL, is she contributing to the wedding? If so, it’s nice to give some input, but regardless of who is paying for it, it is a day for you and your FI, not for the parents as much. Can you have your FI inquire about the flower girl with his mom? Perhaps mention that since your other flower girl can’t make it, you’ve decided to go without?
Post # 6
i don’t think you need a flower girl… we’re having a flower girl but no ring bearer since there will not be any boys of appropriate age coming to our wedding. i worried about this for a bit, but then realized that you don’t have to do things just because convention says so.