Flower Girl/Ring Bearer – How old is TOO old?

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What is the right age for ring bearers/ flower girls?
    3 years and younger : (1 votes)
    6 %
    4 years - 6 years : (9 votes)
    56 %
    7 years - 9 years : (3 votes)
    19 %
    10 years and up : (3 votes)
    19 %
  • Post # 2
    42166 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    kthomas326:  I think it depends on the child. If they are happy to be filling the position, who are we to worry about it?

    If they think they are too old for the role, they probably are. There comes an age where they graduate to junior bridesmaids and groomsmen.

    Post # 3
    8518 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2014

    I agree with julies1949. My flower girl was 8, and she was super excited about it. But I know a lot of other 8 year olds would call it a baby job.

    Post # 4
    3653 posts
    Sugar bee

    Some churches actually have minimum ages for participation. (I guess if younger kids are included they have to be carried?) My daughters had FG of 4 and 9; the coordinating ringbearers were 6.5 and 10. It was just the age that the closest boy/girl were, at the time. The 4 year old wore ivory, to match the bride – 9 year old wore a gown the same color of the bridesmaids, but in a different style.

    My daughter was a flowergirl at 6 in 1989. Back in my day, junior bridesmaids were 12-18; you can probably still find sources that suggest those ages.  In this century, girls kids tend to be taller and develop earlier. My daughter found a bridesmaid gown, with a coordinating (higher neckline) junior gown, for her husband’s 12 year old niece. I think the design was for a maximum of 5’2, including heels, so as a tall girl, she ended up in size 0 bridesmaid.

    My hairstylist’s son asked his 13 year old brother to be ringbearer (the bride’s niece was to be the 3 year old flower girl). I didn’t hear how all that played out). Nowadays you hear of adults fulfilling the roll, on both the bride and groom’s side, including my reading about a bride’s grandmother, who was the flowergirl. I’m sure they had a lot of fun with it.

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