(Closed) FMIL blew up…am I the only one? what to do?

posted 9 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1980 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I’m a little confused about exactly what happened. What did you say to her to make her so mad?

I know this may not be a popular opinion, but this all seems so irrational and “in her head” if you know what I mean. I would just bite the bullet and apoligize. I don’t see much point in making a point or trying ot “stand your ground” because it seems like even you are confused about what the disagreement is over! I sympathize. This is tough. I think I’d call her on the phone every day until you get her on the line. Then keep it short and sweet and say something like

“FMIL, I’m so sorry about our conversation last week. I hope I didn’t unintentionally say something that hurt you. It means so much to me that you are a part of me and FI’s wedding day, and I don’t want anything to interfere with that. Please accept my apology. Will you still be a part of the shower on ____? I would love to have you there”

 

I think saying something like “making a mountain out of a molehill” may seem to diminish her feelings.

Post # 5
Member
1980 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Oooh I see. I hate conflict too. It makes me feel like I’m going to throw up! I just want everyone to be nice to each other all the time! I think a phone call is the way to go– and I’d keep it very short and very sweet. Just bend over backwards for her to get it over with. If she tries to prolong the argument just say

“FMIL, I wanted to call and apologize. I’m not sure if you are ready to talk about this just yet. I hope you can forgive me and we can get past this. Please call me soon when you feel like talking”

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