Post # 1
Our wedding is 3 weeks away & my FH just informed me that his mother does not want to do the mother/son dance. He is disappointed, but not heart-broken, even though he spent considerable time picking out the perfect song. My father & I will be dancing and I know my mother expects a mother/son dance. She already has mixed views about my FH’s parents, so I don’t want to give her any more ammo. Is there something else that can be done in place of the mother/son dance? Or should we just skip this part all together? My Future Mother-In-Law is shy/meek and does not like to be the focus of attention.
Post # 3
I don’t see why your mother would look down on his mother for not wanting to be the center of attention. Some people are so uncomfortable doing that and that is ok. I wouldn’t worry about it and just skip it. If anyone says anything about it, just say that Future Mother-In-Law really wants the focus to be on the bride and not herself and that you find it rather sweet, that will stop anything anyone has to say about it.
Post # 4
You could play the song during regular dancing time and he could dance with her like any other dance. That way, they wouldn’t be the center of attention, but it would still technically happen.
Post # 5
I thin given that your Future Mother-In-Law is meek and shy it would a really bad idea to find a way to put the spotlight and make her feel uncomfortable and knowing how worked up some people can get when they have to be the center of attention even for a few moments I can imagine it would cause her to be anxious.I suggest you let this go, or arrange something private with just your Fi and his mom so she not nervous.
As for your Mom you don’t have to bring it up to her, and if she ask just tell her it’s not important to either of you that you have a Mother/Son dance and change the subject.
Post # 6
It doesn’t really matter if your mom expects there to be a mother/son dance that is between your Fiance and his mom and if your Fiance understands I’d just leave it alone. I would rather her be feel comfortable and enjoy the wedding then being so nervous about having to dance that it ruins her time. Some people who are that shine its just painful for them to be center of attention. Most people enjoy the Father daughter dance the most anyways.
Post # 7
I don’t get why your mom would even have an opinion on this? I think it’s important to respect your FMIL’s wishes. I like PPs suggestion to have the song played during the reception where they can dance without the awkward spotlight.
Post # 8
That seems like an issue between your Future Mother-In-Law and Fiance. If she doesn’t want to do it, you shouldn’t worry about it. The only one people will ask is her anyways.
Post # 9
We are doing the father/daughter and mother/son dance at the same time. Could you do that? Then maybe you could convince your Future Mother-In-Law that she won’t be the center of attention, because you and your father will also be on the floor with you.
Post # 11
I’d let it go if she isn’t comfortable doing it.
Post # 12
to be honest, what your mother expects is irrelevent. if doing it is going to stress Future Mother-In-Law out then she shouldnt have to. full stop. if your mother makes any comments about it you simple say that that is how fi and her wish it.
i second the idea of playing the song during normal dancing time (so everyone else dancing too) so he can dance with her