Weddingbee boards

Alright bees, in my absence I've been holding this all in. My FMIL drove me nuts over the holidays.

Since FI and I got engaged, there has just been tension between his mom and I. She keeps making these strange comments, that kind of imply I'm spoiled or stuck up.  I'm not sure why she thinks this because I don't live an extravagant life.  I showed her a website picture of my wedding dress (since she refused the invitation to come dress shopping) and she seems to think it's some super fancy "Say Yes to the Dress" designer dress.  I mean it's a Casablanca dress, so it wasn't exactly a bargain but it certainly isn't as extravagant as other dresses I know are out there. 

Then she keeps making comments about how she thinks I'm going to be the reason FI moves away from her.  I visited the East Coast recently and she was like "Oh I'm glad you didn't fall in love with it over there, because then you'd be convincing diverboy to move there"  I just said "No if we decide to move anywhere, it will be a place diverboy and I both like."

She also mentioned that for future years, we could spend Christmas with my family, and Thanksgiving with her. She said this to FI but looking at me, which I'm pretty sure was just to see what I would say. (Pretty manipulative IMO considering she's a therapist) I responded with it would be better to always switch so no one feels left out, and she was like "oh good I was hoping you'd feel that way" WTF?

At Christmas her and her sister were asking what my plans were for getting my Ph.D. and she says "Oh that's not really in your plans anymore"  Not that it's really any of her business but FI and I just said it was on the back burner and that the right opportunity hadn't come up.

Now, my sister and FI's cousin are going bridesmaid dress shopping in a week, and now FMIL wants to go. So she can get an idea of how fancy her dress needs to be  based on the BM's.  I thought about showing them what my dress looks like, but given the recent comments about what she thinks about my dress and since she didn't want to be apart of the first trip, I'm leaning towards no.

Maybe this all seems like I'm being overly sensitive but  I'm just so frustrated with what an unpleasant experience it is just being with her.  Thanks for letting me vent and get it out!

It sounds like pretty typical MIL crap and it sucks. I would try to just look at it as part of the experience and be glad that none of it is off-the-charts crazy.