- 7 years ago
- Wedding: April 2011
Ok so I figure why not in emotional since this is mainly just a vent! (sorry long!)
Background: My fiance got laid off about 6 months after we started dating, in an industry that basically is becoming non-existant. He had been in the same line of work for 8+years. After a few non-career low paying jobs we decided he should go back to school for a masters degree in a new career. I have a great and steady job and can easily support us (although I said I wouldn’t do so until we were engaged – to protect my own finances) He took loans out until we were engaged. He has a part time job now, goes to school full time, an internship starting next month, and he will graduate this may with a 3.99 GPA. (I’m pretty proud of him!)
His mother thinks he should quit school or go part time so he can have a full time job (my reaction – NO WAY, $10/hr or less is not worth him graduating in another 2-3 years and having a job he hates instead of this may for a career)So she basically berates him about this whenever she has a chance thus every increasing his doubts in me supporting us while he is in school and causing him some serious stress.
My fiance’s parenets are divorced and the don’t always communicate when it comes to wedding issues(have been for quite a while). His father offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner and we have been working on the details over the last few weeks. We figure it all out and the only thing left to do is the wording on the invites – who is hosting? Father-In-Law only or Mother-In-Law as well? since they don’t always talk about this stuff we had to ask, which triggered a disaster.
Future Mother-In-Law told my fiance that we haven’t though about anyone when planning this wedding and how we shouldn’t be getting married now when he doesn’t have a job and is still in school. The whole wedding is costing way to much money blah blah blah.
1st – my family is paying for the ENTIRE wedding. They offered to pay for the rehearsal dinner as well. (we are very very thankful for this)
2nd – yes we are having a destination wedding. But we double triple checked that the lodging/airfare/etc was affordable for fiance’s family that we had to have there – with them!! before we booked anything!! That is all they ‘have’ to pay for.
3rd- no matter where we got married it would have been a destination wedding for 90% of our guests due to where/our families live. Having one in jamaica is giving us the smallest guest turnout possible with the exception of eloping. Thus a smaller rehearsal dinner.
I think this she is just upset b/c she may feel obligated to pay for part of the rehearsal dinner (even though she doesn’t have to) – but to take that out on her son!! that is what makes me angry and I think is not approriate. He is super stressed over this, the last thing he wants is his mom pissed off about his wedding!! (which I totally understand and don’t want either)
Thanks for letting me vent 🙂