- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2011
My FI’s stepbrother wrote in a guest on his RSVP card, even though we hadn’t given him a +1 option. We decided to let it slide, even though I was peeved that he hadn’t at least asked us if he could bring someone and had just boldly written it on the card instead. He is coming from out of town, and apparently this girl has been his girlfriend for over a year (though we’ve never met her and didn’t know that he was even dating her). But still, I thought he should have at least called or emailed and run it by us.
So last night, we were talking with Future Mother-In-Law, and we found out that she had told him he could bring his girlfriend. Her reasoning, “It is expected that out of town guests will get to bring someone.” First of all, is that even true? Is it some piece of common knowledge that I have missed, that all out of town guests are supposed to get a +1?
Second of all, while I could kind of overlook the fact that Future Brother-In-Law did not call and ask us about this (after all, he’s younger, and not the most mature guy), I’m really surprised that Future Mother-In-Law didn’t have the good sense to give us a call and say, “Hey, is it okay if Future Brother-In-Law brings his girlfriend to the wedding?”
What on EARTH gives her the right to decide who is invited to the wedding, without even running it by us?
Then, during this conversation last night, she said, “We’ll pay for her extra seat.”
Um, no you won’t – it’s not really a pay-as-you-go kind of thing, we have to pay for all guests upfront, and there’s no way my mom (who is paying for the reception catering) will accept money for this. And that’s not really the issue at hand anyway. The issue is that we don’t have any extra room for other guests at our venue, and we didn’t really want a bunch of people we don’t know at our wedding, hence why we only offered the +1 option to people that we actually knew their SO and who are engaged, married, or living together.
I really think she should have at least asked us about this beforehand. We would have said okay, and I wouldn’t be so irritated with her now.