- 1 week ago
- Wedding: October 2017
My FH’s parents got divorced when he was 8 (13 years ago), and ever since things have been kinda patchy between them. They don’t really like eachother (obviously) and don’t get along so well. Most of it’s his mother’s overly-emotional reactions and behavior–she’s a very off-in-la-la-land, artsy, blacksheep kind of a person and has a big tendancy (so basically every social event ever) to drink too much at get togethers and events and then make it awkward and embarrassing and stressful for everyone involved. She’s “ruined” multple big holidays, a college graduation, birthdays, some family reunions, and even a few Mother’s Days with this behavior. She’ll arrive (late) after having a few, then drinking too much during, and then drunkenly stumble out having someone else responsible for driving her home.
We’re having a small wedding–literally just immediate family and one or two of those close friends who are virtually family to us. Max it’s 16 people.
We’re both worried about his mother. Because it’s so small, we’re going to try to just go to a nice restaurant for brunch afterward to make it easier/less stressful. And (speaking form experience), I know she’ll drink too much and make a scene. With a big “real” wedding with a lot more people and a reception where everyone kind of blends in and gets lost in the shuffle, it wouldn’t be quite as obvious. Plenty of people get drunk and act silly at receptions; but when it’s a smaller affair, it’s much more obvious and much more embarrassing.
Call me selfish, but neither of us want this and I personally don’t want to put either of our families through it, especially after all they’ll have helped us with and done for us in an effort to put the wedding together.
What do we do? Is there anything we can do, besides just brace ourselves? My FH is worried she’ll show up way late (or even miss it altogether) just out of negligence or getting lost on the way over, drunk and emotional, but we can’t just not invite her. She’s his mother.
Advice? Words of wisdom or reassurance?