Post # 1
Ok Bees. I debated posting this for a while. My FMIL told me that she found some dresses she loves. She saw them in the window of a dress shop. The problem? They happen to be prom dresses. Legitimate prom dresses.
I’m struggling with this. I want her to feel beautiful and love what she’s wearing, genuinely, I do. But I have this feeling that these dresses just aren’t that appropriate for a more formal wedding and for the mother of the groom. I mean, if she REALLY loves these dresses and wants to wear one, I wouldn’t tell her no. I just don’t want other people to judge her =/ It really comes from me caring. It honestly has nothing to do with jealousy or trying to tell her what she can and can’t wear.
The other thing is she wants to match the bridal party. My girls are wearing Bill Levkoff chiffon dresses in Glacier, and my MOH is wearing a dress in teal. I don’t want her to blend in with the bridesmaids, I think she should have her own color.
So anyway, onto the dresses.
Dress #1 Front
Dress #1 Back
Dress #2 Front
Dress #2 Back
I’m starting to think dress #2 isn’t that bad. I think the spaghetti straps aren’t really appropriate, but I would still be ok with it. But she wants to wear it in the same blue as dress #1, which is pretty close to my bridesmaids dresses.
So Bees… What do I do??
Post # 3
I think #2 is far superior dress than #1. I agree she should have her own color too. Something that compliments but doesnt blend. I’d tell her she should have a different color so she can stand out more
Post # 4
Why don’t you offer to go shopping with her and suggest something more age appropriate?
Post # 5
- Wedding: September 2014 - Banff, Alberta
I think the green one is classier than the other, but still pretty young. The purple one is very childish why would she want to wear that?
Post # 6
@louisianablue: We are going to go shopping because she really wants to try on these dresses. I just don’t want to offend her with suggesting something more sophisticated.
@Pixienickie: She likes the silver sparkle on it.
Post # 7
I tried to make a suggestion to my MIL, letting her know that my mother was wearing a traditional MOB dress with a jacket, but she bought a tacky purple beaded cocktail dress with a handkerchief hem. She was the one that looked silly at the end of the day.
Post # 8
I think #2 could be acceptable, maybe with a shawl or a stole of some kind…
#1 is way too young and sexy…
I wouldn’t think it’s a huge deal if she wore a similar colour to your BMs, she won’t be in the pictures with just you and your bridal party.
Post # 9
I think the blue one is inappropriate for anyone older than like 21. The purple one is nice, but it could definitely be made more appropriate by adding a little shawl or jacket. Ask her if she will be willing to do that? I agree that she should be in a different color that compliments the color scheme of your wedding party. Maybe silver?
Post # 10
Wow! I’m curious to know how old she is…
Between the two, I’d pick #2 for a MIL. It may look even better with a shall or warp around the shoulders too. #1 is definitely too young and sexy…then again maybe that’s what she’s going for.
Post # 11
@SneakyBee: I voted let her wear what she wants, but maybe when you go shopping you could ask a salesperson to suggest a few styles she thinks would look good on FMIL? If you could add in a whisper to the salesperson that you’d love FMIL to wear something that DOESN’T look like a prom dress, that might help.
Post # 12
Ok, convention dictates that those are not MOB dresses, BUT I have to say… if I had a kid old enough to be getting married and I thought I could plausibly pull off that first dress, I would be tempted as hell.
Post # 13
@buzzingalong: She’s in her early 50s. She’s pretty tall (5’10”), pear shaped. She’s a fairly average weight.
Post # 14
I actually really like the purple one! I think if she had a shawl or something it could look really nice. I wouldnt mind if my mom wore it.
Post # 15
Hey call me old fashioned but I think #1 is inappropriate. It’s too revealing and not age appropriate. #2 is better, but it would look more elegant with a wrap or shawl.
Post # 16
I totally agree with everyone who has said that the first one is not appropriate but that the second one could work.
I’ve had some long thoughts about the color thing because my mom told my MOH early on that she wanted to match her, which I do NOT want! So, I’ve made sure to include “extra” colors in my wedding colors when I talk to her. My main colors are coral and light green (which my MOH is wearning), but I’ve included accent colors in my list – dark green, beige, black – so that when she wears one of these colors she still feels like she matches and looks like part of the wedding. It’s a plus for me because she’ll coordinate well, but it really makes her feel included.