Post # 1
FMIL had a whole list of people she asked about inviting and I told her we were restricting to family and very close friends (FI and I each invited like 2-3 close friends). With just that, its at 120, which is more than we really wanted but we both have big families.
Anyway, FMIL said something to her neighbor (who just moved halfway across the country) and thought she was getting an invitation. How should I handle this? This person is under the impression they are getting an invite, which is not the case. We purposely didn’t invite friends of the family because it would add to the guest list. If I went ahead and invited this person, I feel like I would have to do the same for my side also.
Post # 3
I would ask FMIL to apologize. She’s the one who led the friend to believe that she was getting invited, right?
Post # 4
@AlwaysSunny: Yes. I don’t think it was purposely. She must have forgotten about our conversation or something but I did tell her just family.
Post # 5
Don’t send the invitation and have your FMIL handle it when she questions why she didn’t get one. It’s her problem, not yours. Either way, she’s not invited. Do NOT back down or your FMIL might make the same “slip up” again.
Post # 6
@JacobsMama: Have your FI tell his Mom to clarify this now so the ex- neighbor doesn’t start buying a dress etc.
Post # 7
Just don’t send the invite…if your MIL confront you tell her that you discussed it with her (even better if you send your FI to resolve this with his own mom)..if this friend of your MIL confronts you ever..just remind her your MIL phone number..and let these ladies discuss the issue…There is no reason for you to feel uncomfortable..
Post # 8
@JacobsMama: The person lives across the country, so you won’t be running into her. It is not your problem- it’s your FMIL’s. Don’t send an invite and you are by no means obligated to explain anything to her.
Post # 9
@JacobsMama: At the risk of sounding blunt, I’m just going to say don’t invite the neighbour. It’s your FMIL’s problem if they get upset about not receiving an invitation – she’s the one who gave them that impression in the first place, not you.
I’ve had experience with this – my own mother isn’t paying for our wedding but wants to invite God knows who and has already told them that we planned to get married next year. I’m just going to smile and send my invites to who we actually want to have there and be done with it. Sorry Mum, I love you, but NO!