Footing the bill for bridesmaids?

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
7654 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@MoodyFoodie:  Well, I paid for my MOH’s dress but not hair, but I know that many brides do pay for it, especially if you want it done a certain way. If you don’t, I wouldn’t pay for it, but maybe as a special gift you could buy your MOH’s dress at least?

Post # 4
Member
4890 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

At the end of the day, it’s totally up to you. That was a nice gesture of the other bride to do, but when you sign up to be in the bridal party you assume responsibillity to pay for what you’ll need.

My DH paid for him tux rentals for his guys. He did this in leu of groomsmen gifts, because he felt like they’d probably appriciate not shelling out for a tux and they didn’t need another monogrammed flask or thing they won’t use. Likewise, I paid for my girls hair/makeup as my gift to them. I really wanted airbrush makeup, which is expensive, and so the cost of their hair/makeup was just as much as the tux rentals. 

Post # 5
Member
30 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

One wedding I was in the bride paid for all of us BM to get our hair done the day of, but that was considered our gift. Another paid for nothing. I paid for my BM dresses, and my aunt is a stylist and is doing the girls’ hair for nothing as a favor to me. I personally, have never expected the bride to pay for anything for me. It is an honor to be in someone’s wedding, and I fully expect to foot the bill. 

Post # 6
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@MoodyFoodie:  Well I didn’t ask my bridesmaids to pay for anything besides travel.  I didn’t ask for a shower/bachelorette party, they didn’t have to purchase dresses, shoes or jewelry, I took care of their accommodations and offered to pay for their hair and make-up (they chose to do their own).  I would feel very uncomfortable forcing my closest friends to spend their money on my wedding like that.  I think this is cultural/regional though.

Post # 7
Member
449 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@MoodyFoodie:  im in the camp that if are expecting anything you have to pay for it. I wanted eveyone in the same dressnso I bought them. However since you are letting them choose a dress then I think they should pay. I would research for you MOH for inexpensive dresses. As for hair if you are requiring them to get it done you should most certainly pay. 

Post # 9
Member
2782 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@MoodyFoodie:  My sister paid for my dress and my hair for her wedding.  

I WANT to pay for my bridesmaids, but I am not.  I am still determining if I will be able to help with them getting thier hair done- no- I don’t want it done a certain way, but I think it would be a nice thing to do.  

You are not REQUIRED to pay for BM dresses, etc….if I am asked to be a BM, I assume ALL costs are to be covered by me, and anything I get covered is “extra”.  BM’s can always politely decline, and explain that they’d love to, but it’s simply not in their budget right now.  I think most people will understand.

If you can’t afford to pay for the BMs, tell her (them) politely if it wa possible, you’d be paying for them (word it much better- you get the idea), and it it’s a hardhsip on anyone, you understand- and them back out?

I know for me- to make it easier for the girls to shell out money, I am doing the same- allowing them to pick out ANY black dress they want.  That way they can wear it again if they choose and find something they like that’s affordable.  For the guys, we picked out Vera Wang tuxes- they are $201.98 to rent.  We asked all of them if this was OK, and if it wasn’t there was one that was $40 less they could have gotten.  All of them were a-ok with the VW.  

Don’t bend your budget to the point you’re uncomfortable, just be clear what you will and will not pay for, and give everyone one last chance to back out.

 

Post # 10
Member
8425 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@MoodyFoodie:  I think you just have to talk to your BMs because each circle seems to have varying expectations.  I know I don’t consider anything that is wedding related a gift (i.e. jewelry, shoes, dress) unless it is something they would definitely wear/use frequently.  I ended up spending about $100 in gifts on each girl, plus I made them customized jewelry (they have very different styles/tastes), macaron coin purses and pop up thank you cards.  Again, I think what is acceptable/expected is going to vary greatly from one group to another.

Post # 11
Member
3084 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

@MoodyFoodie:  I have been in weddings and I had to pay for everything. Hair, shoes, dress, makeup, etc. I actually never heard of getting dresses and stuff paid for until this site. 

Is she married? When she does get married will she pay for all of that stuff too?

im not paying for dresses & stuff for the girls. You don’t have to. 

Leave a comment


Sent weekly. You may unsubscribe at any time.

Find Amazing Vendors