Post # 1
My husband is considering either taking my last name or giving only my last name to the children and keeping his last name. He has some time to think about this. I would really like to hear from bees whos husbands (or husband bee’s!) took their wife’s last name. I KNOW you are out there!
1) Why did you/he do it?
2) Was the paperwork a pain?
3) How do you and him deal with jerks?
4) Were you / Was he proud to take your/his wife’s last name or did you/he do it to make her/you happy (but really don’t care either way)?
PLEASE stay away nay-sayers!
Post # 3
I don’t really count but I wanted to say it’s awesome when a guy is willing to change his name. My partner was 100% willing to, but he has the same first name as my brother so that woud have been waaaaay too weird for me (its weird enough already :)) I think he would have been proud to take my name, but he’s not the sort of person to care much either way
I guess his willingness to take my last name made me more comfortable with taking his… I don’t think I could do it if he wouldn’t consider taking mine. I like the idea of us sharing a last name, too.
Post # 4
I’m commenting because I’d be interested in who on the bee has done this.. Too cool!
Post # 5
Have you thought about both taking each others name and creating a hyphenated last name so your kids can have both?
Post # 6
My husband did this! He completely dropped his last name, so if we were originally named “Anna Beth Campbell” and “Dirk Errol Focker,” his name is now “Dirk Errol Campbell.”
1) The biggest reason that he changed his name to mine is this: he didn’t want to have his father’s last name anymore, he wanted to show he truly is a different man by having a different name. I talked to him about his feelings just last night, and he told me that having the new name was very freeing. Another big bonus is that his old name was one that had him teased all through middle school and even snickered at behind his back as an adult. Sort of in the same vain as the made up name “Focker” that I listed above. The first name last name combination was horrific. Also, I did not want to change my last name and it was very important to him that we have the same name. When we were first getting serious, I had multiple people make fun of me for being the future “Anna Focker” because it really does sound terrible. I love my name, and in addition I had written papers under it.
2) No! Other than the woman in the Social Security office making a rude comment, the process has so far gone smoothly. He still has many places to update, but his name is officially changed.
3) He works in a field that is dominated by women 9:1, so most of the comments he has received have been “Cool!” I, on the other hand, work in a place dominated by men 9:1. I didn’t tell anyone he changed his last name. We also moved at around the same time as getting married. Most people don’t actually know my last name, so it’s possible in the future if they find out we have the same name they will think I changed. As far as friends go, they had no problem with it.
4) He is INCREDIBLY proud to have my last name, and is very, very, very happy with his decision.
Post # 7
VERY interesting thread!!!!
Post # 8
My FI and I have talked about this a lot. He hates his last name, since it causes people to make lots of jokes. Unfortunately my name also sucks, so that won’t change much of anything.
After that, we realized that we want our kids to have his name since I have four nieces and nephews with my last name and all of his have his BIL’s names. So we have just decided that we will both keep our own names.
I know a number of couples who have combined though, and I think that is awesome!